


Because of You

by particulataste



Category: Shawn Mendes (Musician)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, College AU, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Smut, bad boy, good girl
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-17
Updated: 2019-07-29
Packaged: 2020-03-07 01:21:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 35,723
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18862855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/particulataste/pseuds/particulataste
Summary: They’re like trilliums; growing in the harshest of conditions and blushing the most beautiful shade of pink as they bloom.





	1. Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shawn arrives at his new college and he’s a little unsure about his housemates.

It’s midday when he arrives on campus. Dark, swooping curls sitting on his head and they bounce a little from the breeze of the wind. It’s a little chilly out, that crisp May air, and he’s only wearing a green t-shirt and some black skinny jeans, but he doesn’t feel the bite of the chill.

He’s taking his time to look around the parking lot. There are a few nice ones — an Audi and a Range Rover a little closer to the main building, and Shawn supposes they belong to the ones living off their Daddy’s credit cards. He scoffs to himself.

His tattooed arms and hard-set jaw are quick to catch the attention of a few girls passing by, whispers slipping past their pretty lips and Shawn can’t help but smirk to himself and give them The Look. He knows the effect he has on women, specifically their nether regions and he’s known to use it to his full advantage.

But being unbelievably good looking and a known Bad Boy doesn’t always get him what he wants. Which is why he’s scuffing his feet as he walks into the Administrator’s Office of Canada’s most prestigious college, University of Toronto. He’s still confused how he got here in the first place after losing his scholarship back at NYU, but he supposes it probably has something to do with the fact that his Aunt is the Dean of the place.

He knows he’s getting unfair treatment, that others work their fucking asses off for this place to even look their way, but he’s not exactly bothered by it. He’s getting what he wants for half the work and isn’t about to bitch about it.

“Shawn Mendes. I was told to come here and get my schedule and key.” He huffs out, solid arms folding over the high desk in the reception and the young girl behind it stares up at him for a moment. She’s completely caught off guard, saliva stuck in her throat at the sight of him and she shakes her head and stares back down at her computer, typing away and trying to compose herself.

Shawn can’t help the arrogant smirk that appears on his lips. She’s pretty, really pretty, actually. Big brown doe eyes and long wavy hair. Her skin looks soft, lips plump and glossy and he wonders what they’d feel like wrapped around his co—

“Shawn Mendes as in… Cathy Mendes’ nephew?” And there it is, the question of the day. He purses his lips and nods his head, noticing the way her pretty eyes light up and she beams a bright smile. “You’re all everyone’s been talking about.” She tells him, bottom lip caught between her pearly teeth and Shawn grins.

He leans forward a little, raising his brows just enough for it to be suggestive and with a ducked head and a low voice, he tells her, “It wouldn’t be the first time.” And he’s pretty sure he can hear her gushing beneath that stupid fucking desk.

Her cheeks brighten beneath the layer of makeup painting her skin and Shawn’s eyes trail from her face to her chest, biting at his own lip at her perfectly round tits just  _spilling_ out of her blouse and he wonders how that wasn’t the first thing he saw.

Before he can say anything else, his name is being called in an all too sharp and familiar tone to his Mother’s and he stills, turning with a sigh. Catherine Rose Mendes stands across from him with an unamused glance and arms folded across her chest. She’s in a pantsuit that Manny no doubt got her for her birthday this year and her long hair has been cut short since the last time he saw her.

“Hey, Aunt Cathy.” He grins, and though he’s smiling like he doesn’t have a care in the world, his heart is stammering in his chest because she’s the one that will make or break his future, and though he won’t admit it, he’s not prepared to be deemed a failure by his own family.

“Shawn.” She greets, voice stern but he knows she’s trying to be professional, knows she really wants to scoop him up in her arms and he’s thankful for the former.

Cathy eyes the receptionist sceptically and clears her throat. “Danielle, close your mouth.” She quips and the girl blushes bright red, staring right at her computer screen and sinking down in her chair a little.

Shawn smirks to himself, following his Aunt out of the reception and into her office. It’s fairly sized, a big bay window behind her desk that looks out to what Shawn presumes is the quad. Her walls are decorated in few certificates and diplomas and there are at least five bookcases that stare back at Shawn, almost mocking him for not being able to pronounce the titles even if he tried.

“Glad you showed up.” Cathy begins, taking a seat behind her desk and Shawn watches her for a moment, the way her perfectly manicured fingers point to the chair opposite her and he lets out a short huff of breath and takes the seat.

“Didn’t really have a choice,” he grumbles and he knows he’s being sour. Cathy gives him a pointed look—the same look his mother gives him when he’s said something he probably wasn’t supposed to—and folds her arms over the top of the desk.

“You can cut out the attitude, I’ll tell you that right now.” She tells him, voice calm and expression void. Shawn isn’t sure if that’s scarier than her being angry or disappointed, but he knows he doesn’t really want to find out.

He sighs and rolls his head back, pinching his eyes closed. He knows that his Aunt is stubborn and strong-willed, something her and Manny share very clearly, and it shouldn’t come as a surprise to Shawn but he can’t help but feel he’s at home again, being moaned at.

Catherine Mendes is not a force to be fucked with. She’s lethal when needs to be and still knows how to have a good time.  _She_ was the troublemaker out of her and Shawn’s father growing up, and maybe that’s why Manny sent him to her because he knows she can relate to him and maybe talk some sense.

She watches her nephew for a moment as he tries to calm himself down. He isn’t angry, they both know that. But he’s fucked off and tired and just wants to get on with whatever the fuck he needs to get on with. Cathy gets the hint when he rolls his head back down to face her, eyes a little darker than before and if she squints just hard enough, she’s sure she can see them glossing over.

She swallows back what she wants to say and reaches for a sealed, brown envelope, twisting it and her fingers gently push it across the desk so Shawn can reach it. He furrows his brows at her. “It’s your schedule and campus map. I already got you the books you’ll need. The receipts are in there, you just have to pick them up from the library.” She explains.

Shawn’s frown only deepens when he pulls out the map and receipts and a little silver key falls out, clanking against the table and the plastic of the little keyring bounces as it does so. He picks the dainty thing up between his thumb and forefinger, inspecting it like he’s never seen one before.

The little trinket is white, Greek blocked writing in the centre of it.  _ZΘΨ_. Shawn lets out a humorous chuckle and dangles the keyring in his Aunts face. “You’re housing me in a Frat house? You sure that’s the best decision.” He’s grinning, knows exactly what kind of parties and girls that can be found at Frat houses and he thinks he might’ve hit the jackpot and his Aunt is too naive to see it.

“It’s not a Fraternity, and I’m not babying you, Shawn. You got three strikes, and you’re out.” She tells him, snatching the key from his grasp and throwing it at his chest. He doesn’t feel the impact as it sits in his lap, and all he can do is raise a brow.

“Now go to the house and get yourself settled in, I have a University to run.” She tells him, and just like that, he’s back in his Jeep, key in his hand and he stares at little Greek fraternity symbols for a moment too long. He doesn’t know how to feel about it. On one hand, it’ll be great chances for drunken parties and getting his dick sucked, but on the other, he’ll have to  _live_ with other people and something about that just doesn’t sit well with him.

Nevertheless, he follows the map Cathy gave him to the destination of his new temporary home that she’s circled with a bright red marker. The little roads that surround the campus are quiet for this time of day, and Shawn begins to wonder just  _who_ he was going to be moving in with. One thing was for sure, he can’t handle any fucking jocks.  _No way._

It’s even quieter when he pulls up outside of the house, and his Jeep is drowning in its enormous shadow. He can tell it won’t just be him and a couple of other guys, and he knows his Aunt is already cackling to herself at the thought of his face right now.

He groans and kills the engine anyway, rubbing a hand through his slicked back hair and he groans at the feeling of his fluffy curls begging to make a reappearance. He’s pulling his keys out as he opens the door, hurling out of the Jeep and slamming it shut.

He wants to delay this whole process as much as he can, but the air is getting colder and Shawn would much rather be inside than stuck in the cold and the rain when he notices the looming storm clouds above him.

With a huff, he rounds the back of the Jeep and pulls the trunk door open. He’s hauling out three duffle bags of clothing to start with and tugging out his slick black guitar case. He holds the bags in one hand and gently places the case on the curb, closings the trunk and picking it back up.

He’s kicking his booted feet against the ground as he slowly steps onto the path. The veins in his arms are protruding from the weight of his things, and he’s fairly certain his biceps might actually tear through his shirt at any given moment.

The closer he gets, the more the house looms over him. It’s bigger as he walks the steps of the front of it, and the whole ordeal is just a little more daunting than it was when he was sitting in his car.

Shawn doesn’t do neves, never has and likely never will. When he was growing up, his mother always told him  _‘nerves mean you care’,_ but as he approaches the front door, he feels something unfamiliar in the pit of his stomach.

He’s sure it isn’t nervous, though. Blames it on the fact that he hasn’t eaten in over seven hours and his mothers’ persistent warnings just an hour before he left Pickering for this hellhole. He’s not upset with her, never could be, but he wishes she stood up for him more when his father sent him away.

He knows it was a long shot to move to New York for college, and he knew it was a matter of time before he lost his scholarship and got kicked out. It all came tumbling down and Shawn was willing to stay put but when his father showed up and dragged him back to Pickering, he had no choice but to listen and attend UofT.

He’s so caught up in his thoughts that he doesn’t notice the chatter from the inside of the house, and it’s only when he looks up from his feet that he finally notices the front door is open and a tall redhead and short brunette are standing by the threshold.

The redhead clears his throat and Shawn sets his bags and guitar by his feet on the porch. “Shawn, right?” He asks and Shawn nods his head with slightly squinted eyes.

Brian Craigen, a history and economics major, holds his hand out in greeting and offers a grin. “Brian, man. Nice to meet you.” Shawn eyes his hand for a moment before nodding his head a little and shaking his hand.

“Yeah, you too.” He’s weary when he speaks and his eyes soon flicker to the short brunette by his side. She’s got a cute button nose and soft brown eyes, long straight hair and half of it sits in a bun on top of her head. Shawn can’t help the cheeky grin that sneaks its way on his pink lips and he sees the way she blushes under his gaze.

“I’m Maisee.” She introduces herself with a little wave. She’s nibbling on her red-stained bottom lip and her dainty fingers play with the sleeves of her tousled blouse that’s tucked into her denim shorts.

He nods and swipes his tongue out against his lips. “Shawn.” He repeats his name, momentarily forgetting Brian’s still standing there until he clears his throat again and Shawn finally acknowledges his presence for more than just twenty seconds.

“You want some help with your stuff?” Brian offers, pointing to his bags and Shawn nods, watching as Maisee wanders off, grinning back at him over her shoulder.

Shawn bites his bottom lip and grabs his guitar and other duffel bag and follows Brian inside his new home. “Don’t get any ideas with her. She’s great, and all, but she’s bad news.” Brian tells him gruffly. Shawn hums, not really taking the information in and he’s too busy looking around.

The walls are a light, dusty grey and aesthetically white and black furniture decorate the emptiness. He’s shocked at the cleanliness of the home and with furrowed brows, he follows Brian through the foyer and into the equally clean kitchen.

“Dude, why is this place so clean?” Shawn asks, nose slightly scrunched up when he notices three more people in the room. He’s standing beneath the archway as everyone stops what they’re doing to look at him. Brian sets his bags down beside the centre island and lets out a soft laugh.

“That’d be Lola.” Brian laughs out, rounding the island and he searches through the fridge for two beers, handing one to Shawn who takes it thankfully and pops it open. Shawn frowns and takes a sip.

“Who’s that? Your maid?” He quips and he doesn’t mean it rudely, for once. He’s curious as to how a Frat house is so clean and organised, and by the looks of Brian, he doesn’t seem one to have his shit together.

Maisee laughs from her place at the stove. She’s stirring a large pot of pasta and Shawn presumes that maybe she’s on lunch duty. Is that a thing in this house? “No, she’s a student and she lives here. Her OCD flares up sometimes so this place is always spotless.” She explains, not bothering to look over her shoulder and Shawn can’t help but frown to himself over her sudden sense of coldness.

“You mean… girls… live here?” He asks. He knows he sounds like some hormonal teenager but he’s more than shocked that his Aunt would allow him to live in a house with a practically endless supply of pussy, whenever he wanted it.

“Yeah. It’s only Lola, Maisee, and Raegan,” Brian begins to explain, pointing to the blonde that sits at the table, head in a book. She waves a hand over her head, looking up for a couple of seconds to offer Shawn a smile.

He nods his head in affirmation and looks back to Brian. “Then there’s us guys. Me, you, Dean,” he points to the Asian guy that’s reading a magazine. His hair is styled back into a quiff and he’s wearing skinny jeans and a shirt.

“There’s Mackey, he’s at a class right now. And Oliver is on grocery run.” Brian explains. Shawn takes a moment to nod his head. He knows there’s no use even trying to remember these names, knows he’s not going to be talking to them much.

“Where’s Lily?” He asks as he eyes the group.  _Ah, wrong already._ Brian stifles a laugh and shakes his head, noticing the death glares that Raegan seems to be sending him over the top of her book.

“Her name is Lola.  _Not_  Lily.” She corrects him, brows slightly scrunched and as quickly as she interjected, she returns her attention back to her book. Shawn raises a brow at her boldness, then he realises that none of them actually  _know_ who he is and maybe he’s a little relieved about that.

“ _Lola_ is at work. She picked up a double so she should be home for about 10 p.m., in the meantime, let me show you to your room.”

* * *

It’s 11 p.m. and Shawn’s all unpacked in his new bedroom. The walls are bare and his closet is only partly full, but he’s unpacked. He’s got his laptop set up on his desk and he’s made his bed to the best of his ability. His toiletries are in his bathroom and the steam is still pouring out of the room from his shower twenty minutes ago. He supposes next time he’ll open a window.

He’s dressed in a pair of gym shorts, laying back on his bed with his back against the headboard and his acoustic guitar sitting in his lap. He’s strumming softly at the strings and he thinks he might’ve found a melody until a soft tapping on his door stops him from following the feeling.

He sighs and places the guitar in his bed, quickly tugging on a green t-shirt and wandering to the door. He’s pushing back his wanton curls when he opens the door to her. She’s pretty, he supposes. She’s got light auburn hair that’s thrown in a ponytail and sharp blue eyes that sparkle as they stare up at him. She’s got full lips and a little crook in the bridge of her nose. Her face is void of makeup save for a little mascara and brow powder, and Shawn can see the little blemishes that scatter her cheeks.

She’s short, too, Shawn reckons around 5ft 6 and her left front tooth slightly overlaps the right. She’s got that good girl look about her and for once, Shawn’s not interested in corrupting it. He raises his brow and she drinks him in. He’s tall and lean, muscular, she’s sure and his biceps are begging to tear through his shirt. His jaw is sharp and skin clear, and his lips look so soft and pink. What gets her most, are his curls. They’re fluffy and wild and she can’t help but want to run her fingers through them.

Maisee told her he had a bad boy vibe, but right now, she can’t see anything other than  _soft_. “Welcome to UofT,” she greets him softly, and he’s pleasantly shocked by her voice. It isn’t as sickeningly sweet as he had thought. It’s a little raspy and velvety at the same time and completely unexpected by Shawn.

“I’m Lola.” She introduces herself with a hand out for him to take. He does, hesitantly. Her skin is soft on his and she beams brightly up at him, despite just having worked a fourteen-hour shift on three hours of sleep and a slice of dry toast from this morning. Not to mention she still has to study for her test tomorrow morning.

“Shawn.” He greets, smiling through pursed lips and she releases his hand. She smells like flowers and if it isn’t for the florist apron covering her front, he would’ve thought she’s been laying in a field all day.

“You work in a flower shop?” He quips, and suddenly she’s so cliche. A good girl working in a flower shop, what a surprise. Lola stills at his tone and retracts her hand, fiddling with her fingers and she retracts her gaze from his face.

She clears her throat and looks back up at him. “Yeah, gotta pay the bills somehow.” She jokes, trying to lighten the mood, but she knows he’s probably going to be a dick about it and tease her.

He nods. “But we’re all living here for free.” He retorts. Lola sighs and closes her eyes for a moment. Yes, they’re all living there for free. Maisee’s father is the owner of the building and promised her and her housemates could live free of charge, providing there’s no complaints or drugs.

She scratches her forehead. “Yeah, but we have cars to pay for, and groceries, books, supplies… you know.” She trails off and Shawn can tell by the way she doesn’t look him in the eye that she’s hiding something. “And besides, I like flowers.” She tells him and this time her voice is a little harder and there’s a tick in her jaw.

Part of him wants to tease her and he isn’t sure why. Maybe it’s just his inner dick showing but the way he’s speaking to her makes the young woman feel uncomfortable and she feels so unworthy to be under his gaze.

He’s not bothered, really. But his Aunts words continue to play in his head and he knows he has to keep out of trouble and not start upsetting people. Three strikes and he’s out, and he isn’t about to get his first one on his first night here.

“Anyway, I just wanted to say hello,” Lola concludes, her stomach breaking into an uneasy heard of elephants and she’s sure she can taste the bitterness he’s protruding.

She spins on her feet before he can say anything else and Shawn watches her disappear into the room next to his.  _Great_ , he thinks.  _We’re neighbours_. With a huff, he kicks his door closed and bounces back on his bed, guitar sitting back in his lap as he plucks inspiration from nowhere.

From the other side of the wall, Lola let’s put a breathy sigh and closes her bedroom door. She’s leaning against it as she tugs off her apron and unties the hair band in her hair, her long auburn locks falling as she does so.

She struggles to calm her breathing and she isn’t sure why. She’s used to being intimidated by other people, but he’s doing it on a whole other level. Her body feels hot and her cheeks are flushing, and she’s certain she can feel a wetness between her legs.

“Cut it out, Lola.” She tells herself, shaking her head and taking another deep breath. She’s stripping from her clothes when her phone goes off and she quickly picks it up as she steps out of her shoes.

**iMessage from Miss Mais**

_Total hottie right?_

Lola giggles at her friend and she can’t help but nibble on her bottom lip. She’s running the water of her shower, waiting for the temperature to heat up as she quickly texts Maisee back.

**iMessage from Baby Lo**

_Gonna have to agree on that one lmao_

_Don’t get any ideas, though! He’s our roommate and you can’t go whoring around with him, it’ll make it awkward for all of us here :/_

**iMessage from Miss Mais**

_You’re only saying that cause you secretly wanna hop on that dick. God Lo, you’re such a slut!_

Lola stifles out a laugh and shakes her head, phone thrown into the bed and she climbs into the shower. The water’s hot on her aching body and she takes her time to let the water run over her.

Her rosy nipples pearl beneath the hot water and she runs a hand through her hair, brushing it from her face. She feels hotter than before, chest heaving and she cups the swells of her breasts before her hands slowly travel down the expanse of her stomach, and she can’t help but wonder what it’d feel like if his curls were ticking her skin like her fingers.

Shawn stills on his bed at the sound of a strange noise coming from the other room. He frowns, resting the guitar against his nightstand and slowly makes his way toward the other side of the room.

He can hear the shower running and he knows it’s Lola. He’s about to roll his eyes and wander off when he hears a soft groan and sharp intake of breath. His eyes widen and cheeks flush and he hears Lola let out another shaky moan.

She’s showering and she’s touching herself. Shawn gulps, entire body heating up and he’s not sure if his mouth is watering or if it’s growing dry. He feels a twinge of something familiar between his legs and by the time he looks down, there’s a small tent forming and he’s straining in his boxers.

_Oh fuck._


	2. Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A party will be fun, he said, but God does she wish he didn’t.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brief mentions of sexual abuse, please do not read if that is a trigger for you or makes you uncomfortable.

Lola Davenport is a people-pleaser. She doesn’t know how to say “no” and often finds herself swallowing back her discomfort to put others wellbeing first. She’s always been like it, gets it from her mother, so it’s no surprise that she’s been dragged into yet another one of Maisee’s  _brilliant_  ideas.

“And you’re not skipping out halfway through, either.”

Lola sighs to herself as she stacks the red solo cups. It’s Friday afternoon and her and Maisee are getting the house ready for Shawn’s surprise party tonight. A week has passed since he moved in and after a little planning and cash spent on drinks, it was well and truly underway.

“I’m not gonna skip out. I already told you.” Lola speaks softly, though she  _is_ wondering if maybe she’ll be able to sneak off toward the end of the night so she can get a head start on her paper due next Wednesday.

Maisee already seems to know what she’s thinking and she takes the plastic cups away from her fiddling hands. “I mean it, Lola. As much as I love you and your anti-socialness, you need to get out a little more. And besides, I invited Chris, so you  _have_  to come.”

And just like that, Lola’s gaping at her best friend. “Why did you invite Chris!?” She near shrieks and Maisee let’s out a scoff like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “Um, ‘cause he’s into you…  _duh_.” She frowns, twisting the bottle of liquor on the counter to read the names.

Lola frowns to herself and lets out a shaky breath. “But  _I’m_  not into  _him_. He freaks me out, Mais,” Lola argues but she knows her pleads are falling on deaf ears. Maisee waves her off and shakes her head. As much as Lola loves Maisee, she doesn’t love her attitude right now.

“He just likes you,” she argues back and Lola has to take another deep breath in an attempt to shake off the anxiety that she can feel crawling up her chest. It’s typical Maisee, really. She knows how Lola struggles with her anxieties and she’s always been one to show her the “tough love” side to it, and in the past, it’s worked. But now, all Lola can feel is her chest caving in and her hands growing clamming and she knows she’s on the verge of a panic attack.

“One… two… three,” Lola finds herself whispering under her breath, bottom lip quivering. “Blue,” she whispers to herself, eyes darting around the room as she searches for three blue things. Mackey’s book, couch pillow, Shawn’s shirt. She stills.  _Shawn’s shirt? Shawn_. “Shawn.” she squeaks out, hand reaching to smack Maisee in the side.

He’s standing in the doorway, dark curls slicked back. There’s a hint of a smile on his pink lips and he’s wearing a thin leather jacket that Maisee thinks looks like pure sex. “Shawn! What are you doing here?” Maisee giggles out breathlessly. Lola fights back the need to roll her eyes at her best friends whorish antics and Shawn nibbles down on his lower lip.

“I live here… remember?” he jokes half-heartedly and she almost gushes at the sound. Lola clears her throat and subtly nudges her friend’s side. “Thought you had classes ‘till seven?” Lola interjects, though she knows there’s no real use in lying about what they’re doing.

“Got cancelled.” He shrugs, wandering into the kitchen and grabbed a deep red apple from the fruit bowl. Lola watches as he takes a bite out of it and lets out a sigh. She isn’t sure if she’s thankful she’s able to stop secretly set up his party, or if she’s angry that he didn’t come home sooner.

“So… what’s all this?” He asks, hands gesturing to the mass of alcohol and party food and all Lola can do is stare at his stupid head and wonder why he slicked back those gorgeous curls.

Before Maisee has the chance to fabricate a story, Lola is blurting out that it’s his surprise party. Shawn’s quirking a brow and taking another bite of his apple when Maisee sends her friend what can only be considered a death glare, but Lola doesn’t exactly care. She doesn’t want to go to the party and she’s hoping that maybe Shawn will force her to call it off with that stupidly charming smile.

“A party sounds fun.”

* * *

 

It’s warm and it smells. Lola’s kept herself in the kitchen the entire night as she’s kept away from the ruckus of horny college students. She’s got a cup of lemonade in her hand and she tries to fight back the urge to run upstairs and lock her door behind her.

The party has been in full swing for well over two hours now and Lola is more than eager to leave. She hasn’t seen Shawn since earlier this morning and she isn’t even sure if he’s actually here. Maisee is off with her second guy of the week and Lola isn’t sure where the rest of her housemates are.

She’s been avoiding Chris all night, running out of the room whenever he entered it and she knows she’ll have to face him at one point, but that won’t stop her from trying to delay it. “Aye, Miss Lola Jane, what are you doing here all on your pretty lonesome,” a husky voice booms through the kitchen and Lola looks up from her cup.

Oliver and Mackey come bolting into the room, arms around their shoulders and they struggle to hold their drinks and keep their stability. Lola’s heart warms at the happiness on her friends’ faces and she giggles to herself at just how far gone they seem.

“Too loud out there,” Lola shrugs, welcoming the warm hugs that the young men give her. Mackey and Oliver Belford: aka, the hottest twins on campus but the brothers Lola wishes she had. They both circle her and hold her close until she’s squished between them.

“Want me to make them be quiet?” Mackey asks, ruffling a hand through his golden locks and Lola stifles out a laugh and shakes her head. “S’Okay, Mack. You two should go back in there, though. Go have fun!” She tells them and though they don’t mind staying with her, they wander off anyway and blow a kiss as they leave the room.

“Aye! Mackey, Olly!” Brian shouts out to his friends from across the room. He’s wearing a green tee with little holes decorating it and a pair of skinny jeans that sit low on his waist. The twins approach him with grins, hollering out greetings to the tall curly-haired man with them.

Shawn’s having a good time, and to say he’s surprised is an understatement. He’s got a beer in his hand and a light blush to his cheeks. He knows it’s from the alcohol and the attention he’s been receiving all night, and he’s already got his eye on a pretty little brunette that’s been eye-fucking him from across the room for the past thirty minutes.

“Boys,” Shawn greets them, and it’s like he’s known them for years. Mackey works with Shawn at the garage on Thursdays and Saturdays, while Oliver majors in music and is tatted up to his shoulders, something Shawn took a quick interest to and it wasn’t long before he was friendly with all the guys in the house.

“Mendes, let me tell you something,” Mackey slurs as he slings his heavy arm over Shawn’s shoulder, “I think you’re pretty cool, for a  _bad boy_ , and that little piece of ass over there is  _totally_  begging for it.” He snorts out a laugh and Oliver can’t help but shake his head and frown at his brothers choice of words.

Shawn shakes his head and sets his drink down on the mantelpiece of the fireplace. He’s enjoying himself, and maybe it’s because of the alcohol or the fact that he  _knows_  he’s getting his dick sucked tonight.

“Bro, I can’t believe you’re from Pickering and we’ve never met before.” Brian laughs out. He and Shawn have grown closer over the past week, learning that somehow, they have a lot more in common than they thought.

They’re both born and raised in Pickering, both like beer and parties. They share other smaller interests, too. Brian likes bikes and Shawn fixes them. Brian likes tattoos and Shawn has plenty. It’s definitely a blooming bromance and for once, Shawn isn’t all that mad about it.

He’s kept to himself, aside from spending a few hours hanging out with Brian here and there. He supposes maybe one day he’ll open up a little more to him, but for now, hanging out in the present is enough, and he isn’t ready to drag his past into his present.

Shawn shrugs and stifles out a laugh, not wanting to tell him that he was in with the wrong crowd and was the reason for so many headlines that met the papers. “Guess our paths just never crossed,” he argues, and he’s thankful for that. It’s only been a week and Brian is already more solid that Shawn’s previous ’ _friends’_.

“Gonna go grab some pizza.” He tells them, offering Brian a pat on the back and a tight-lipped smile to the twins. Shawn weaves through the groups of people he doesn’t know, paw-like hand coming up to push back his slick curls. He breaths out a small sigh as he enters the quiet kitchen. The surfaces are smothered in splattered pizza slices and sticky alcohol and the thought of cleaning it in the morning gives Shawn a brief headache, but he’s sure Lola would have a whale of a time.

He hears muffled voices and hums from the utility room on his left as he wanders to the fridge to pull out a bottled water, no longer in the mood for pizza, (not that there was any left anyway). He laughs to himself under his breath, the couple in the room no doubt too eager to wait until they’re home, and Shawn’s about to leave the kitchen until he hears a desperate whimper and he stills.

He’s not so sure if it is a bunch of horny college students anymore when the pleads of  _“stop, I mean it,”_ come out louder and clearer, desperate and serious. His eyes widen and for a moment, his heart stops, but the second a heartbreaking sob sounds from behind the door, he’s kicking it open before he can even think.

There’s a blond dude hunched over a young woman he’s got cornered against the sink. Her hands are frantic as she tries to push him away but she doesn’t have to try much longer when Shawn tears him off her and sends a quick jab to his nose. It isn’t until the woman looks up that Shawn’s stomach drops to the pit of his stomach.

_Lola._

Brian comes bolting into the utility room, eyes frantic and he quickly pieces together what just happened. He dags Chris out by the scruff of his neck when Raegen and Maisee come racing through the door, standing on either side of Lola as they escort her out of the room and to her own.

Shawn watches as they pull her away, catches sight of her red cheeks and mascara smudged eyes. She’s shaking with terror and embarrassment and Shawn has to stop himself from calling her name or pulling her into him. As he turns around to the kitchen, a large crowd has formed and the music’s stopped.

Shawn lets out a growl and that once carefree persona is long gone. “What the fuck are you all looking at? Party’s over!” He roars out and he isn’t sure if it’s in anger or something else. The partygoers are quick to scramble and suddenly, he’s left alone with his thoughts and a completely trashed house.

Brian, Mackey and Oliver are locking up and making sure everyone left, Dean passed out on the couch with a bottle of wine cuddled into his chest and Shawn wonders for a moment how the whole ordeal hadn’t woken him. He supposes he still has a lot to learn about his roommates.

He takes to the stairs, jaw set hard and he’s almost certain there’s steam oozing from his ears and nose. All he can think about is  _her_. He’s desperate to know if she’s okay, if he hurt her… but he doesn’t know what he’d do if he had. His shoulder slump as he walks down the hallway, eyes widening when he sees both Maisee and Raegen leaving Lola’s bedroom with pursed lips.

“Is she okay?” Shawn rasps out and he doesn’t know where this sudden hesitation and worry is coming from. Maisee looks up at him with a slightly tilted head, like she’s trying to read what his angle is. Raegen sighs and shrugs. “She just wants to be alone.” Shawn frowns. “So you just left her? After what just happened?” he quips, voice raising before he can even process what he’s said.

Maisee squints at him, wants to know what his deal is and Shawn is quick to notice her attitude toward him. “Sorry.” He quickly apologises for his tone, and it’s yet another thing he can’t seem to understand why he’s doing. The girls walk past him in silence and Shawn watches as they both enter their own bedrooms, closing the doors behind them.

As he turns his head, he stares at Lola’s door. He doesn’t know how long he stands there for but after a few minutes, he realises he’s standing right outside it and he doesn’t know what he’s doing, but he can hear her cries through the thick wood and he just wants to scream.

She’s shaking as she sits in the corner of her room, and she tells herself she’s being stupid, that she shouldn’t be so upset about this. But she is, she’s fucking  _distraught_ and she has to remind herself that she has  _every right_  to be. She was violated and she doesn’t even want to fucking look at herself.

Shawn stands there until her cries quieten down to silent sobs and his fists clench by his sides. He forces himself to move, to turn on his heel and go into his bedroom that’s right next to hers. He pretends he doesn’t hear her crying herself to sleep. Just like she pretends she doesn’t hear him leave his room an hour later to clean the house for her.


	3. Part 3 (Smut)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shawn’s settling in and Lola can’t seem to keep her mouth shut, even if she only means well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> slight smut; oral (male receiving), swearing.

He’s sweating.

There’s dirty oil smothering his bulging biceps and his short sleeves have been rolled up, sitting on his shoulders. His hair is a mess, slicked back with gel and sweat but the girl in the sunflower dress thinks he looks like sex.

He’s meant to be working, refitting an engine, to be exact. He isn’t, though. Instead, he’s chatting up Corina, his boss’ niece and if it isn’t for Mackey working across the garage, he’d have her bent over the table with that pretty little dress hiked up her waist as he pounded into her pussy.

She’s perfect, he thinks. Gorgeous skin, innocent eyes that he  _knows_  will be the death of him, and the most mind-blowing hourglass figure that he can even make out beneath her loose fitted dress. He can only imagine how juicy those tits must be.

He doesn’t bother trying to hide his clear arousal toward the young woman, and if anything, he makes it clear as day when Mackey looks over and the tall boy is pressing himself against her, a taunting smirk on his lips as he whispers something filthy in her ear.

Mackey shakes his head and clears his throat, supposes he should probably help a brother out. “Yo, Shawn,” he calls out, watching as Shawn looks over Corina’s shoulder to see him. “Go take your break. I got it down here.”

He doesn’t bother hiding his grin as he wraps an arm around her waist and pulls her into the building, giggles slipping past her lips when he guides her into the bathroom.

He’s shoving her against the door, lips hot on her neck and she sighs out in sweet relief. Her skin tastes like strawberries and Shawn can’t get enough, swears it’ll be the death of him. She tugs on his slicked-back curls, knows they’re gonna be untamable, but at this moment, he can’t seem to care.

His hands snake down her sides and to the hem of her little sundress before he’s hiking it up around her hips. Corina’s breaths are shaky in his ear as she licks the shell of it. Shawn’s fingertips graze against the silky skin of her thighs and all he wants is to have them wrapped around his head.

He’s panting and she’s barely done anything. His fingers feel the soft cotton of her panties and she’s soaked through already. He fights back a smirk as she pulls away to look up at him, gorgeous brown eyes batting away and she skinks to her knees with a smirk of her own.

Shawn nibbles down on his bottom lip, the anticipation almost becoming too much as she fumbles with his belt. He throws his head back and takes a deep breath. He  _needs_  this. It’s been too long and if he doesn’t have a pussy or pair of lips wrapped around him in the next ten seconds, he’s gonna burst.

It’s like she gets it, though, like she hears his thoughts and she runs her soft, wet tongue up his throbbing shaft. He’s big. Thick and the perfect length and her pussy is pulsing just looking at it. His tip is red, sore and angry, and all she can do is pepper kisses to it as she drinks him in.

She’s pulled his jeans and boxers down just enough so she can scratch up his thick thighs. Her plump lips tickle at his balls, sucking them into her mouth and she swirls her warm tongue around them, and Shawn’s seeing stars. Knows it’s over for him when she releases with a pop and sucks up half his cock like a pro.

He’s fucking her face, holding it in place by her blonde locks and she doesn’t even gag when he hits the back of her throat. He’s completely gone, can’t tell his left from his right and he swears to God he’s gonna die and this is the best way he could ever fucking imagine.

She’s taking him like never before, slurping and lapping him up. Shawn’s head is thrown back, eyes rolling and he feels like he’s going to explode. “Holy shit,” he pants out, beads of sweat dotting his hairline and he’s seeing stars.

Shawn’s fingers thread through her locks, shoving her head closer to him until his cock is snug down her throat and her button nose is pressed against his naked pubic bone. “Ah, shit,” he cries out as she swallows around him, coming up for air.

She’s grinning up at him, eyes watering and plump lips swollen and soaked. Her own saliva is smothered across her chin and a sting of it meets her lips to his tip. His cock is soaked too, completely fucking drenched and he wonders how tight her pussy would feel.

“You like that, baby?” Corina purrs up at him, long, dark lashes fluttering and he bites back a moan, doesn’t want to let her see him so fucked and vulnerable. He’s biting on his bottom lip, groans bubbling in his throat as she sucks him back up again. She moans around his shaft, tongue swirling on his underside and she pumps what she doesn’t want to fit in her mouth.

Shawn’s hips are jutting into her face, eagerly chasing his release and she’s coaxing him on; sucking harder and pumping faster. He’s a spluttering mess, vision clouded and dotted with white lights and he’s coming. He’s coming so fucking hard, Corina struggles to keep it all in her mouth.

His arousal drips from the corners of her lips and Shawn watches with blown eyes, jaw slacked. She’s still staring up at him, grinning as she swallows everything he gave her. Shawn groans, taking a shaky breath and tucking himself back into his pants.

Corina giggles and licks up what slipped past her lips, raising back to her feet and leaning into him with puckered lips. Shawn grimaces and pulls back, dodging her kiss like his life depends on it and she sinks back to her feet and stifles a laugh.

“Oh, you’re one of  _those,_ ” she quips, and Shawn can’t help but scoff. He leans back against the walls, head rolled to the side slightly and Corina just wants to mark up that pretty neck. Shame she doesn’t get to.

She squints, like she’s trying to read what’s on his mind, but it comes back blank. “My number’s in the books. Call me.” And just like that, she’s spinning on her heels and strutting out of the bathroom and out of the garage completely, hips swaying like she didn’t just suck the soul of his dick.

He stays there for a moment, trying to catch his breath and wrap his head around what had just happened. Just when he’s about to leave, Mackey is standing at the doorway with arms folded over his chest and a knowing smirk.

“Fuck off, dude,” Shawn grumbles out a laugh, fighting back the blush that sits on his cheeks. Mackey shakes his head at the young man and guides him back into the garage, throwing a greased up cloth at him and just like that, Shawn gets back to work.

* * *

He’s getting frustrated. The notes don’t flow together and he can’t get the damn melody right. It’s 2 a.m. and Shawn’s a mess. He’s not sure why he’s sacrificing his sleep to play around with his stupid guitar, but he really thought inspiration would strike. It hasn’t.

He stops his strumming and lets out a sigh, his stomach churning and he hears it gurgle silently. With a huff, Shawn throws on a shirt from the ground and makes his way out of his bedroom. The hallway light is on and he can hear soft, yet frantic tapping as he makes his way down the stairs.

He rounds the corner when he notices the kitchen light on and papers sprawled around the island, and his heart stops a little. Lola sits with a furrowed brow, earphones shoved in her ears and she’s gnawing on her bottom lip as she types her fingers raw. Her hair is braided back and she’s got a stupid, slimy looking facemask on and she hasn’t noticed Shawn’s presence.

He’s tempted to turn around while he still can, avoid her the way she’s been avoiding him for the past week, since that night at the party, but she catches his head of curls from the corner of her eyes and she’s pulling out her earphones and offering a soft, yet nervous smile.

“Hi,” she breathes softly, and it feels like it’s the first time he’s hearing her voice again. He’s not sure why he’s so bothered that she’s been avoiding him. And maybe he wouldn’t be bothered if it was under other circumstances, but he’s been silently worrying and treading on eggshells for the past nine days and he fucking hates it.

“Hi, yourself,” he tries to make it playful, to ease the air that’s suffocating them in the room and she breathes out a stifled laugh. Shawn sits opposite her, watching the way she chews on the inside of her cheek, a nervous habit, he supposes. He can’t figure out what’s going on in her head.

“What are you doing up?” Lola finally asks, and her voice is just as velvety as he remembers. She’s trying not to make eye contact, doesn’t want to deal with the awkward tension between them both. Never had been good with confrontation. Shawn seems to get the hint, and just like that he’s willing to forget the whole thing.

He shrugs, “I couldn’t sleep,” and he’s got his chin propped up in the palms of his hands as his elbows rest on the counter. He’s got those gorgeous fluffy curls again and Lola just wants to brush her fingers through it. She doesn’t, though.

Instead, she nods her head and gently pushes her laptop screen down so she can get a better look at him—like she’s making up for the nine days and three hours that she hasn’t seen him for.

“I have some camomile tea in the cupboard. I always find that helps me with sleeping, you can have some, if you want.” She offers with a tight-lipped smile and picks at her nails. She struggles to look him in the eye, terrified he’s going to bring up the night of the party and she isn’t sure she can handle that. She hasn’t spoken to it, about anyone.

“Why are you always so nice to everyone?” He can’t help but ask the question that’s been stuck in his head since he met her. She’s silent for a moment, a little stunned because no one’s ever asked her that before. She’s just nice. That’s who she is. She doesn’t know anything else.

Lola shrugs. “I have no reason to be unkind,” and Shawn can’t help but frown at her words. Part of him gets it, though, somewhere deep down, but the more conscious part of him doesn’t.

“Haven’t you heard of  _‘kindness is weakness_ ’?” He asks with slightly raised brows and she falls into herself a little, something that doesn’t go unnoticed by Shawn. Lola doesn’t want to look at him, doesn’t want to mutter out an answer and she’s too stuck in her head, wondering if Shawn had meant to backhandedly call her weak.

“I guess I’d rather be weak than an ass.” She shrugs, and this time, Shawn isn’t sure if she meant to backhandedly call  _him_ an asshole. He sees the hint of a teasing smile on her lips and he can’t help but chuckle whole-heartedly, know she’s only playing, but he’s also sure part of her is being truthful.

Shawn squints at her. “Why are you up, then?” He quips and he tries to keep it light and playful. Lola lets out a shaky laugh and motions her hand across the surfaces. “I have a poetry essay to write, and I haven’t quite finished annotating everything,” she explains briefly, worried her talking will bore him and if she’s honest, she quite enjoys his company.

He hums and nods a little, about to say something when she speaks again. “And I heard you playing, you’re really good. You should see Professor Mayer about joining his class.” She smiles brightly, so bright that she misses the way his face hardens and jaw sets.

Lola doesn’t stop talking, though, doesn’t hear the alarm bells in her head or see the way his face turns an angry shade of pink. “You were listening to me?” He asks, stuck in complete disbelief, and Lola isn’t sure if his expression is one of anger or embarrassment.

It’s the former.

“I mean, the walls are thin, of course, I heard you,” she explains and before he can get a word in, she’s rambling again. “And you’re really good! I don’t know why you put up this hard front, you should be pursuing music, not keeping up this bad boy look.” She speaks, and Shawn can’t help but see red.

How dare she tell him who he is and isn’t.

“You don’t know shit about me, so back the fuck off.” He spits at her, and he doesn’t miss the way her face drops and shoulders slump. He doesn’t care. He spins on his heels and ignores the frantic calls of his name and eager apologies as he bounces up the stairs, anger rolling off him in waves.

Lola sits in her spot, completely frozen in shock and her whole body jolts when she hears him slam his bedroom door and glass shattering on the floor.


	4. Part 4 (Smut)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola’s father comes to town and Shawn finds himself in a more than satisfying situation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> swearing, smut; masturbation.

The house is a tip, Lola thinks. The cushions on the couch aren’t fluffed, the throw blanket over the back isn’t straight and she’s only just deciding that the rug beneath the coffee table is too big for the living room.

The house isn’t a mess. The surfaces are spotless and literally shining from the amount of polishing Reagan had done, the floors have been swept and mopped thanks to Brian, and the throw blanket over the back of the couch  _is_  straight.

The house isn’t a mess, Lola is. She’s snappy and not at all her perky self. It’s 11 a.m and she’s forbidden anyone from walking around the house with their shoes on, and insisted that if you eat, it’s  _over the fucking sink or not at all_. She doesn’t mean to be a controlling, raging bitch, but she’s stressed beyond comprehension and she only has thirty more minutes to make sure everything is perfect.

Her Dad is visiting. The one man that Lola likes to think she doesn’t take shit from, but in reality, he’s the route of all her men-troubles. He’s ignorant, stubborn, filthy rich and, in Maisee’s word, _a complete and utter fucking DILF_.

Grayson Lee Davenport is not only Lola’s biological father, but also the founder and CEO of GLD Trading, one of the most successful business in all of the Greater Toronto Area. It’s something Lola tends  _not_ to brag about, and if anything, it’s something she purposely tries to go out of her way to hide.

It’s bad enough she shares his last name, she doesn’t want the entire campus (or everyone she meets, for that matter,) to know he’s her father. It’s not that she’s ashamed…  _exactly_. More that she’s completely and utterly disgusted by his presence alone. He’s controlling, manipulative… a bully, and Lola doesn’t like it one bit.

Shawn’s bouncing down the stairs when Lola rearranges the cushions and takes a step back to inspect their straightness. He’s got on his black skinny jeans and a white ribbed vest. His signature black leather jacket is flung over his shoulders and his dark curls are slick back smoothly.

He notices Reagan first, how she’s dusting the tops of the picture frames on the walls. Her shirt has ridden up a little and so has her skirt, the hem of it barely resting below her ass and Shawn looks away, eyes catching sight of a distraught Lola, instead.

“No, it’s still not straight.” She huffs in aggravation.

The apples of her cheeks are growing rosy and she’s tugging at the roots of her hair out of frustration. Shawn’s never seen her like this and he can’t help but raise his brows in amusement at what she seemed to be getting so upset over.

He takes a step closer to her, brows still raised and she stomps her foot like a child, and that’s when Shawn decides he can’t hold back a little laugh. Lola spins around and grits her teeth at the grinning young man.

“What? What the fuck is your problem, huh? Why don’t you fucking help instead of standing there, not doing shit!” She isn’t sure where it came from, no one is. Her chest is heaving with anger and everyone stares at the redhead with wide eyes and slacked jaws. Shawn’s fairly certain his head has been bitten off and he’s too much in shock to say anything back.

No one gets the chance to say anything before her shoulders are slumping and she’s rushing past everyone and up the stairs, slamming her bedroom door behind her. Shawn gapes at the spot she was just standing in and lets out a choked noise when he feels his boxers begin to strain.

_Oh, no._

He spins around when Brian lets out a sigh and Shawn can’t help but raise his brows in amusement again as he tries to mask his arousal. “What the fuck was that about?” he scoffs out a laugh as everyone disperses and Mackey takes the trash out.

Brian huffs and straightens the pillow for Lola, although he’s quite sure he just made it worse. “Her Dad’s coming to visit today,” he explains briefly and Shawn isn’t sure why that’s such a big deal and what other information Brian clearly isn’t telling him.

“That’s it? Why is she getting so uptight about the house and that fucking pillow?” Shawn asks, completely bewildered and feeling more than a little out of the loop. Brian shrugs and spins a little, inspecting the rest of the room to make sure it was up to standards.

“She doesn’t like him. He’s a dick.” He concludes, offering a smile through pursed lips and all Shawn can really do is gape at the man. Lola, not liking another human being? That must be a joke. Shawn waits for Brian to say so, but he doesn’t. He walks off with a little whistle and goes out to the backyard to help Dean and Maisee pull up the weeds.

Shawn hums to himself and takes a deep breath. His pants are growing more uncomfortable by the second, hands growing clammy and he clears his throat. He’s alone in the lounge ans the sun’s shining. It’s almost 3 p.m. and Shawn has a class in forty minutes. He’s nibbling on his bottom lip, wondering if he has time to quickly get himself off and not be late for class. Usually, he wouldn’t care, but his attendance is already falling and he doesn’t want a formal meeting with Aunt Cathy and his parents.

Shawn says fuck it and takes for the stairs, bounding up them three at a time and he thought it would’ve been uncomfortable in those tight jeans. He’s racing straight for his room and misses the way Lola tries to call out for him to apologise, and he’s unknowingly slamming the door in her face right after.

She wanders off with a sigh and he’s stripping from his clothes, leaving them as a trail from the foot of his bed to his bathroom. The water’s running as his cock hardens, chest slightly heaving and he lets out a shaky breath. Stepping into the shower, he leaves the door open and allows the steam to filter through the bathroom.

He’s standing directly beneath the showerhead, scolding hot droplets of water racing down his toned torso, few sitting in the divots of flesh that form his abs. His skin is still a little sunkissed from his time in New York, golden and tan and his cock jumps a little when the water pelts down on him and his rosy nipples are caught in the crossfire.

He’s thinking about her, about the way she scolded him and the harshness of her tone. He’s thinking about how hot she looked with flushed cheeks and a heaving chest. The way her lips seemed fuller and eyes darker. He’s teasing himself at the thought of her whispering dirty things in his ear in that same voice—pinching his rosy nipple between his fingers and giving it a gentle twist.

He wonders what her lips would feel like around him.

His free hand gently slides down his front, softly grasping his rock hard cock in his hand. He seethes quietly, head thrown back as he teases his slit with the tip of his finger, a string of pre-cum connected from his head to the pad of his finger. He swirls his arousal over his length, knows it isn’t enough to get him going but it’s a start.

Shawn isn’t sure if he wants to picture her spread out with legs wide or sinking down on her knees in front of him. He’s torn between two of the most orgasmic images he could ever muster up in his dirty little head and for a moment he wonders if he should even be thinking about her at all.

His worry quickly ceases when his mind makes the decision for him and he sees her sinking to her knees, staring up at him through those pretty lashes. He thinks her eyes would be blown, that she’d have this innocent look about her – stronger than what it already is.

Shawn slowly pumps himself, sighing out in relief and he pictures her dainty little hands doing it for him, instead. He thinks about Lola parting her pretty fucking lips for him, thinks what her warm tongue would feel like, her warm mouth wrapped around him. For a hot second, he’s sure he can feel her sucking on his cock, but he opens his eyes and she isn’t there, of course, she isn’t.

He lets out an aggravated sigh and pumps himself harder. His guttural groans bounce off the walls and he’s placing a firm palm against the shower door, steadying himself the best he can. His eyes are shut tight, mind taking over and all Shawn can see is Lola’s dripping fucking pussy just begging to be eaten, to be treated right.

He thinks he can taste her, smell her, and he’s so fucked at the idea of her playing with herself and making him watch. He wonders if she’d touch her pussy and shove her fingers in his mouth, allowing him to taste her, just not from the source.

He’s bucking his hips into his hand, picking up his pace and it feels so good, so good he isn’t sure how long he’s going to last. Shawn thinks back to his first day here, to when he heard her crying out in pleasure from the other side of the wall as she touched herself. He wants her moaning like that in his ear, running her tongue up his neck as she fucks herself on his big cock.

He wants her crying out for him, begging him to go faster,  _harder_. He wants to feel her tight little pussy sucking him up, squeezing him like the greedy little cunt he knows it is. He’s losing his rhythm, struggling to keep up the pace and he feels himself throbbing. He’s spluttering out guttural moans, growling in complete and utter pleasure and soon he’s covering the glass of the shower door with his arousal, painting it with white ribbons.

Shawn takes a deep breath, tries to steady himself and get back to reality when he realises  _who_ he just got himself off to.

* * *

It’s quiet, silent, almost. Lola flicks her salad across her plate, appetite lost the second her father wandered through the front door. Grayson didn’t come alone, (not that Lola expected him to) he wandered through the door with a young blonde on his hip, who Lola learned was only two years older than her.

“Dinner’s good,” Grayson mumbles with a hand over his mouth. He’s dressed in an expensive grey suit and he’s got one of his many Rolex’ on his wrist. Lola wants to smash it. She smiles through pursed lips and hums. “Yeah, Mom’s recipe. You know, the one she made you seconds before she found out you’d been cheating on her with your assistant.” Lola replies, tone void of any emotion and she takes a sip of her red wine.

Grayson drops his fork on his plate and glares at his daughter. His plus one, Miley, purses her lips and Lola knows she feels awkward, and she almost feels bad for her, but then she remembers she’s only with him for his money and she isn’t that bothered again.

“Problem,  _Grayson_?” Lola makes it clear not to call him her father, doesn’t want to give him the title that he’s done fuck all to earn. That’s one privilege he won’t be given for free. “Lola Jane, watch your mouth,” Grayson warns, dark eyes stern and Lola glares at the older man, wondering why he thought it would be a good idea to start growing out a beard.

“Or what? You’ll force me to move to London with you? News flash, asshole, you don’t control me.” She spits, any and all hints of civilness completely diminished and she’s lost her filter along the way. Grayson smashes his fist against the table and points to his daughter with gritted teeth, and Lola’s thankful she didn’t inherit his bad temper.

The noise can be heard from upstairs and Shawn puts his guitar down for a moment and tries to strain his ears. He knows Lola is having a meal with her Dad downstairs, Brian made it very clear for everyone to stay away. But now Shawn’s a little thirsty and he can’t decide if it’s for water or some tea. He pushes himself up and off the bed, down the hall until he’s at the top of the stairs, leaning down a little so he can hear what’s going on.

“Reel it in, Lola. You know you won’t get anywhere without me, so I suggest you pay me some respect.” He spits. Lola bows her head and bites back her poison, fingernails denting half-moons into the palms of her hand as she tries to calm herself down.

“I’m already getting somewhere on my own. I got  _myself_  this scholarship, and I’m paying  _my_  way with  _my own_  money.” She argues back through gritted teeth and Shawn wants to back her up, knows how fucking hard she works and he’s suddenly desperate to defend her.

Grayson throws his head back with a sadistic chuckle, shaking his head and rolling his tongue against the inside of his cheek. “Yeah… and the second you fuck this scholarship up or find yourself with no more money… you’re coming to London whether you like it or not. You don’t get a fucking choice.” He grits his teeth.

Shawn takes a step back in complete disgust and he can tell by Lola’s silence that he’s hit a nerve. He doesn’t really have time to think before he’s bounding back to his bedroom and climbing out of his bedroom window. He didn’t think to put any shoes on, nor use the fucking door, but he hopes to God he hasn’t got the wrong message.

He climbs down the tree and bends his knees to stick his fall. Shawn dusts his hands off on his sweatpants and takes a deep breath, curls an unruly mess. He shakes his shoulders off a little before reaching for the door and knocking three times.

He can hear Lola pushing her chair out against the hardwood floor, along with her soft footsteps pattering to the door. She opens it, about to greet herself but falls short when she notices it’s only Shawn and frowns. She thought he was upstairs.

“Shawn?”

“Lola! Thank God you’re home, I’m sorry it’s late but I’m desperate. I just found out what’s gonna be on the test tomorrow and it’s something I’m so unsure about, and I know you’re an incredible writer, can you help? There’s no way I’m passing this class without you.” He pleads out, and both Lola and Shawn are more than a little shocked at how believable his little act seems.

Lola splutters for a moment before Shawn raises his brow and silently tells her to go along with it. She nods her head and ushers him inside, noticing the lack of shoes as she peers down and she wonders how the fuck he got outside.

“Um…” before Lola can somehow come up with a way to politely tell Grayson to fuck off, he’s wiping his mouth and standing from his seat, shaking his head. “It’s fine, we were just leaving,” he tells them, Miley soon following and Grayson doesn’t bother to kiss Lola’s forehead goodbye.

Instead, he brushes past both her and Shawn while Miley awkwardly follows. Lola stands there with pursed lips as she closes the front door. Shawn watches her intently, notices the way her right brow twitches and he supposes it’s a tell of hers. She clears her throat and wanders to the kitchen, grouping up the half-empty plates from the table.

Shawn helps, doesn’t miss the way Lola looks at him as they empty the dishes and place them in the sink. He’s leaning against the counter when Lola runs the water, grabbing the sponge and cleaning the plates off with soapy water. “I’m sorry, about yesterday.” Shawn breaks the silence with a soft apology.

Lola stills, hands soaked in the sink as she takes in his words. His voice is soft and tender, and somehow, she knows he’s being sincere. She shakes her head and forces on a smile. “It’s okay,” she mumbles back, stacking the plates on the dish rack and shaking her hands off.

Shawn scoffs and hands her a kitchen towel to dry her hands. “No, it’s not,” he insists. “I was a dick and you don’t deserve that, ever.” She’s avoiding his gaze so Shawn dips his head and cranes his neck until he knows she can see him. She huffs out a small laugh and finally faces him, cheeks still a little flushed and Shawn finally notices the dark circles under her eyes.

“It’s okay,” she shrugs. Shawn groans and widens his eyes at her playfully. “Stop saying that!” he exclaims, enticing the most beautiful fucking laugh from her lips and he can’t help but grin so happily at her. “Okay, I’m sorry,” she laughs and Shawn raises his hands in the air, can’t understand how this smart young woman doesn’t get what he’s saying.

“And don’t apologise! You have  _nothing_ to apologise for.” He reminds her, and Lola thinks for a second, thinks about his complete change in personality and she wonders if this is just Shawn when he’s relaxed; playful and kind. She wishes she always saw this side of him, the fluffy curls and flushed cheeks.

“Okay,” she whispers breathlessly as she stares at him. Lola notices the scar on his cheek, wonders if he got it from a bar fight or something a little purer like a childhood battle scar. She wants to rub her thumb over his soft skin and for a split second, she feels her hand reaching out to touch him, but she quickly stops herself.

Shawn feels like his apology isn’t enough, that she deserves more. He runs a hand through his curls, pushing them back as he scratches the nape of his neck and clears his throat. He points up to the ceiling and scuffs his feet against the floor. “I’m gonna uh, go back…” he trails off and he doesn’t know why he’s being so awkward.

Lola giggles out a laugh and nods her head, shoulders light and she doesn’t feel as tense anymore. “Goodnight, Shawn.” she smiles softly, twiddling her fingers and Shawn’s stomach does a little flip at it. He smiles and nods. “Night, Lola,” he whispers, turning around but looking back at her over his shoulder.

He makes his way upstairs with a silly lovesick grin and he doesn’t bother trying to hide it. He feels relieved, thankful. And it shows on his face when he pounces on the bed with a grin, heart thumping in his chest and he hopes to God maybe she feels the same, he just doesn’t know why.


	5. Part 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola doesn’t usually kiss on the first date, but in this case, she goes against her own rules.

It’s nearing five p.m. when Lola comes strolling through the front door. She’s got a shit-eating grin on her face and excitement is seeping through her pores. She’s hopping on the balls of her feet as she closes the door behind her, cheeks beginning to ache but she can’t find it in herself to care.

She’s skipping through the foyer and straight into the kitchen when Raegan and Dean quickly jump away from each other.  _As if Lola didn’t already know_. She doesn’t say anything, can’t really think about anything other what’s to come tonight.

Dean squints at her. “What’s got you all chipper?” He asks and Lola shies her face into her shoulder for a second before bouncing on her toes and clapping her hands. “I have a date!” Heads turn her way and Lola finally acknowledges the rest of her housemates as they gather around her like she’s discovered fire.

“ _You…_  have a date? As in  _Lola Jane Davenport_ , has a date?” Oliver quips, sheer confusion and disbelief laced in his tone and Lola tries to not be wounded. She scoffs instead. “Gee, thanks, Olly.” He tries to stammer out that he didn’t mean it in the way she took it, but when Raegan swiftly jabs him in the ribs with an elbow, he falls silent.

“So….” Raegan raises her shoulders and brows expectantly and Lola states at her blankly. “Who are you going on a date with!?” She hoots out, arms outstretched by her sides and wonders how her friend is so fucking absent all the time.

Lola’s eyes ignite up and she grins. “Oh! Uh, Liam, the guy from the bar.” Lola softly answers and she suddenly feels like they’re about to interrogate her, kill the lights and force her onto a stool. They don’t. “Oh, you mean Liam from Psych 101.” Dean clicks his fingers and Lola nods her head sheepishly.

It’s hushed for a moment. “Wow, really? Liam from Psych 101 asked  _you_ out?” He repeats and Lola feels that little tug in the pit of her stomach. Ah, they’re surprised, and by the tone of their voices and looks on their faces, she’s guessing they’re astounded that he asked  _her_ out, of all people.

“Liam from Psych 101 asked  _who_ out?” a gentle voice quarrels through the room. Shawn bounces in easily, hair slicked back and he’s got a single curl that falls over his forehead in the perfect shape of an S. He locks eyes with Lola for a moment and he offers a tender smile.

It’s been exactly nine days since he played the hero in her time of need, and they’ve spoken every day since. They’re friends, to say the least. And although neither of them are subtle with their lingering glances and sheepish smiles, they’re also both completely and utterly oblivious.

“ _Lola_ … can you believe it.” Dean says, and both Shawn and Lola’s smiles plummet, though both for completely different reasons. Shawn just raises his eyebrows a little, hopes that they will lift the rest of his face and tug on the corners of his mouth to keep that fucking smile on his lips, though the frown lies heavy and he finds himself struggling.

“You’re going on a date.” He breathes out, nodding to himself as he clamps his bottom lip between his teeth. Shawn isn’t sure why the new information has plagued him, not when he’s still been seeing Corina every other day and the fact that there is absolutely  _nothing_ between him and Lola that goes beyond the means of a flourishing friendship.

“Like… like a  _date_ date?” Brian peeks at his friend.

Lola shrugs and offers a timid smile, tucking tufts of auburn hair behind her ear and she glows just a little, though she isn’t sure why. “So you’re missing movie night?” Mackey finally pipes up, words stifled by the piece of cake he’s just shoved in his mouth.

Lola purses her lips and nods her head. She feels a little wrong. Movie night has always been her idea and she’s always given the other’s shit if they’ve missed one for whatever reason. Movie night is the equivalent of family night to Lola, and she feels like she’s about to disappoint her family.

“Okay.” Raegan shrugs and Lola feels a little load lifted from her shoulders. It’s silent again and she can feel Shawn’s indifferent eyes on her and she doesn’t quite know why. “Um, Mais… will you help me get ready?” Lola asks softly to her friend. Maisee raises her head from the book she was reading, hasn’t bothered to acknowledge Lola’s news.

Maisee has hardly spoken to Lola since the night of Shawn’s surprise party, and it’s beginning to bother her. Lola isn’t sure if she’s done something to upset her friend, she just wants things back to how they used to be. Maisee evades eye contact as she clears her throat and stands from her seat.

“Actually, I’m kinda busy. I’m sure Raegan can help.” She stammers out, surging past the group and leaping up the steps. No one seems to notice the strain between them or the way Lola’s smile sinks into a grimace.

Shawn purses his lips and steps out of the room, silently trailing Maisee up the stairs and he hinders her before she can get into her bedroom. “What the hell is your problem?” He quips out quietly. She spins and frowns, books grasped to her chest and Shawn takes a few more undecided steps toward her.

“Excuse me?” She quietly replies.

Shawn jeers. “Lola. What the fuck is your problem with her? Ever since the party you’ve been a no-show when she’s needed you. And back there, you literally blew her off in front of everyone. So what  _the fuck_ is your problem?” He’s essentially fermenting.

Shawn doesn’t know what comes over him, can’t understand why he’s so hellbent on fixing their friendship. Before Maisee can say anything, Shawn’s shaking his head and turning his back to her, stomping off into his bedroom and slamming the door behind him.

Maisee stands there, dazed. She’s more than a little speechless but part of her isn’t surprised. She’s had an inkling that there might’ve been something going on between Lola and Shawn and now she’s dead certain there is.

He’s right though. Maisee’s been avoiding her. She blames herself, for what happened with Chris at Shawn’s party, and she knows Lola’s too fucking nice to blame her, too. Maisee drops her books off on the desk in her room, staring at the pinboard on the wall. There’s polaroids of them both, Lola and Maisee, smiling and giggling without a care in the world.

Maisee takes a deep breath and wanders to Lola’s bedroom, knocking on the open door and taking a step in. Lola sits on the edge of her bed with a solemn look, gorgeous auburn hair,  _that Maisee’s always been jealous of_ , covering her face and she picks at her fingernails. Nervous habit.

“Hey,” Maisee whispers, Lola’s head snapping up and her eyes are wide, hopeful. “Hi,” Lola breathes and her shoulders raise as hope and love bubble inside her. She just wants her best friend back.

Maisee takes a seat beside her and smiles through pursed lips. “I wouldn’t have come up here if Shawn didn’t convince me.” She admits, and part of Lola appreciates her honesty. The redhead stares at her with a slight frown and somewhat squinted eyes.

“Shawn spoke to you?” She asks, and Maisee doesn’t bother to hide the humorous smile on her lips as she stares at the carpet beneath her. “Yeah, reminded me of what a shitty friend I’ve been lately,” She chuckles out dryly.

Lola purses her lips. “You haven’t—” She’s cut off with a sharp scoff. “I have, don’t even try to deny it.” She insists. Lola stays quiet, stares at the carpet too and this is the most conversation they’ve had in three weeks.

“I’m sorry.” Maisee’s apology echos through the room and Lola smiles softly. Part of her because she already forgave Maisee, the other part because Shawn went out of his way to do something nice for her, for no reason. A blush squirms on her faded cheeks at the thought.

“Me too.”

* * *

It’s midnight.

Her feet are raw, her jaw throbs and she’s pretty sure her eyes resemble a panda’s. Her heels (that she borrowed from Maisee) are dangling from her fingertips by the straps and the soles of her feet are surely as black as dirt.

She’s silent, stealth like. She doesn’t want anyone to hear her sneaking in, nor see that look of utter exhaustion and embarrassment on her face. Her aching toes pad up the stairs, teeth clenched like that’ll somehow keep her movements light and silent.

She thinks she’s made it, that she could be considered for the Secret Service, but she forgets the uneven floorboard outside her bedroom and it creaks, reverberating through the empty hall. She stills for a moment, eyes clutched shut, lips pursed in a fine line like it’ll make a difference.

It doesn’t, and Shawn pokes his head out of his door and smiles when he sees the side of her face that’s masked by her red hair. “Hey… how was your date?” He asks smoothly, running a hand through those luscious curls and he stifles a yawn.

Lola clears her throat and sniffs. “Yeah, it was okay.” She mutters, uninterested. Shawn frowns and steps out of his doorway and toward her. “Just okay? What’s wrong? You sound upset.” He notices, warm hand caressing the side of her cold arm and she finally turns around to him.

She looks absolutely fucking devastated and something about her tottering eyes and quivering lips  _hurts_ him. “He stood me up.” She sniffles, eyes flooding with fresh tears and he doesn’t have time to think before he’s pulling her into his chest and keeping her close.

She’s wailing into his soft, blue shirt and she feels so bad for ruining it with her makeup, but Shawn shows he doesn’t care when he cradles her head snug into his chest and gently coos her. “You’re okay, honey… it’s okay.” He isn’t sure where the nickname comes from, he’s never been one to use them, but it feels right like it was made just for her.

Shawn reaches behind her and opens her bedroom door, carefully ushering her inside and she sits on the foot of her bed as Shawn detaches himself for her. He suddenly feels aloof. He reaches over and closes the door before making his way into her bathroom, grabbing a pack of makeup wipes from her sink and pulling one out of the packet.

“Hey, shh. Look at me, okay?” He whispers, benevolently guiding her hands from her face and he’s surprising himself with this new side of him. Lola swallows, breath caught in her throat as she does so and she’s so fucking enthralled by his kindness.

He gently wipes under her eyes, removing the smudged mascara stroking her soft cheek with his other hand. She stares at him for a moment, almost disregarding why he’s there, but then she remembers.

“Why am I never enough for anyone?” Lola whimpers out and Shawn quickly realises he’s on deep and untouched territory. His mind is screaming at him to run, to get the hell out of dodge… but his heart beats softly and he knows he needs to stay. She needs the company and comfort, and he… well, he needs to know that she’s okay.

“You’re more than enough, honey. Don’t do that to yourself. He’s a dick, okay? He doesn’t deserve you.” Shawn comforts her, makeup wipe on the floor as he cups her swollen cheeks in the palms of his hands.

“Lola Jane, you are the kindest soul I have ever met. You are smart, talented, funny,  _strong_. You are so beautiful, Lola. I promise you.” His voice is straining like he’s desperate for her to hear and believe his words. She does. For a fleeting moment, she does.

And then she kisses him.


	6. Part 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shawn can’t seem to keep his fists to himself and one punch turns into five and what better way to be punished than for his dad to be his number one cockblocker.

Shawn’s never been one to get nervous. Never had the experience of sweaty palms and frantic butterflies in his stomach, or a dazed head and blushed cheeks. But all at once he’s experiencing them when her lips meet his. His mind is in a frenzy, body still as a rock and he can physically hear his heartbeat in his ears. He moves quickly, though. He cups her pretty little face in the palms of his hands and his eyes gently flutter closed. He’s losing himself in it, in her.

Her lips are sweet… plump and soft and Shawn can’t believe he’s kissing her. Lola threads her dainty fingers through his Godlike curls and gives them a generous little tug. He’s seeing stars, his lips are tingling. Lola subtly slides her warm tongue between his lips, the sudden boldness catching Shawn off guard and he pants slightly into her mouth. She tastes like cherries with a hint of peppermint and Shawn finds himself completely mesmerised by it.

Shawn’s hand sneaks its way to the back of her neck, slim fingers twirling her auburn locks and tugging ever so gently, but it only makes her more eager. She’s shifting to the very edge of the bed, fingernails scratching at the nape of his neck and he lets out a soft groan against her lips.

Lola pulls away, panting with what Shawn can only guess to be a dizzy smile and she purses her lips to bite back a soft laugh. “I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have done that, I’m sorry.” She giggles through her embarrassment and Shawn can feel the heat that rises to her cheeks.

He clears his throat, his forehead resting on hers and he nibbles on his bottom lip, savouring the taste of her that’s varnished him. “No, it’s… it’s okay.” He tries to assure her, though there’s a thick silence that sits on them as they continue to lean into each other. Shawn doesn’t know what the fuck he’s doing. This isn’t like him, he doesn’t do this kind of shit. But it’s her, it’s  _Lola_  and Shawn doesn’t want to pull away. He doesn’t want to feel the coldness of her body not being close enough.

The silence becomes unbearable and Lola really can’t help the bubble of obnoxious laughter that bursts out of her. She’s embarrassed, so fucking embarrassed and she hopes to God that Shawn will never tell anyone what she just did.

“I’m sorry, I’m really sorry.” Her laughter rolls off into waves of soft whines and Shawn thinks that she regrets it, regrets  _him_. It’s a sudden feeling of red hot fire all over and an unfamiliar sting in his gut. He’s hurt, he just doesn’t understand why.

“I should uh… I’ll go, let you get some sleep.” He clears his throat with a soft smile and Lola finally pulls off from him, a fair distance between their lips again but she still can’t seem to tear her eyes away from them.

Lola nods her head and lets out a soft smile, breathing still a little shaky and Shawn has to remind himself that he’s not hers. It’s not his job to reassure her, to love her.  _It’s not his job_. “Yeah… uh, goodnight.” She stutters out, wiping her clammy hands on the sides of her black dress and Shawn clears his throat for what feels like the tenth time tonight.

He leans up on his toes until he’s standing tall once more, brushing off his hands and wandering toward the door. She watches his back as he walks away and freezes when he slowly opens it. “I uh, I took your advice, by the way. About Professor Mayer.” He tells her, back still facing her body but Lola shoots up to her feet and her jaw slacks a little.

“I showed him some music. He wants me to write an original for him, a demo, by Wednesday.” He looks over his shoulder at her and she’s grinning so fucking wide, and Shawn is almost certain he can see tears pooling in those gorgeous blue eyes of hers.

“I’m proud of you.” She whispers and this time, it’s Shawn’s eyes that start to water. He offers a smile through pursed lips and rushes out of her room and into his. The second he closes the door, his chest is heaving and he can still feel her body on his.

* * *

It’s noon when Shawn leaves Professor Mayer’s room, guitar in one hand and music sheets in the other. There’s a cool breeze casting over the quad and students chatter softly as they study on the grass. Shawn’s minding his own business when he notices a loud ruckus of chatter and laughter from a little further ahead.

“Should’ a’ seen her, looked so fuckin’ stupid.” The blond snickers, his friends laughing along and Shawn notices something familiar about him. He looks familiar. Shawn squints at him a little longer until it clicks.  _Liam_. He remembers that smug fucking face from when he looked him up on Instagram after leaving Lola’s room last night.

Shawn bites down on his tongue and makes his way over to the small group, their chatter and excitement dying down when they notice the unfamiliar face and Shawn offers a friendly smile as he sets his guitar case and music notes down against a tree.

“Hey, you’re Liam, right? The guy that stood up Lola Davenport?” Shawn asks, a hint of amusement in his tone and Liam grins, smacking a friend in the chest as he tries to buff himself out. He looks so smug… proud, and Shawn wants to wipe it off his face.

“Yeah, who are you?” He puffs out his chest and takes a step forward, shoulders rolled back and Shawn can’t help but scoff to himself.  _What the hell did Lola see in this douche?_  Shawn rolls his tongue and clenches a fist, swinging it until his knuckles collide with Liam’s nose and he’s stumbling back as he clutches his bloody face.

It spirals from there, punches, kicks, hair pulling. It all goes so fast that Shawn doesn’t feel the black eye and cut up cheek and brow until he’s sat in Aunt Cathy’s office and his hands and body are fucking throbbing. He caught a couple of kicks to the stomach, and even though Shawn was beaten blue by four guys, Liam still looks worse than him.

Shawn smiles to himself.

He’s so caught up in his own thoughts and ego that he blanks out the majority of the lecture Cathy gives them. Shawn bounces his knee as he chews at the insides of his cheeks and Cathy quickly grows sick of his nonchalant.

“Liam, you can go.” She huffs, head nodding to the door and he scoffs something out under his breath, not giving Shawn a second glance. Cathy notices the limp in his walk and the way he holds his left arm as he moves and closes the door behind him.

She closes her eyes and sighs. “Strike one.” She tells him, doesn’t need to look at him to know that his stupid smile is wiped off his face. She hears him clear his throat and croak out a half-assed apology that she doesn’t care for. She shoos him out of her room just as quickly and Shawn’s begrudgingly walking toward his jeep as he holds an ice pack to his knuckles and tries to ignore the iron taste of blood on his tongue.

He’s proud, that’s for sure. Knows Liam deserved it and Shawn would quite happily lay into him all over again. He supposes he shouldn’t, though. He’s earning all kinds of looks from girls as he walks by them. Hungry eyes and pursed lips and Shawn supposes they’re just hungry for a good fuck. He growls to himself at the idea but clears his head as he climbs into the jeep and turns on the engine.

It’s proven a struggle when Shawn tries to steer his way back to the house while holding his knuckles and his eye is beginning to close due to the swelling. He makes it, though, just about. He throws the jeep in park and leaves it on the drive, staggering up the steps to the front door as he carries his music sheets and guitar in one hand.

Once he’s through the door, Shawn decides he isn’t going back through it again today. He kicks his shoes off and heads straight upstairs. Shawn only assumes the house is empty by the sheer silence of it and he discards his music sheets and guitar on the bed as he makes his way to the bathroom to take a shower.

His knuckles ache when the water cascades down his body, a large purple bruise forming around his eye and he debates whether or not he should go and find Liam to finish the job. He decides against it. He has homework.

* * *

Lola is fuming. Her face is a bright red and her little hands are clenched into fists by her sides. She doesn’t bother greeting anyone when she gets home, completely ignores them all and takes to the stairs. She bounds up them two at a time, could do three if her legs were a little longer. Her heavy footsteps can be heard as she crashes down the hall, drowning out the chatter from everyone downstairs and Lola barges straight into his bedroom.

“Are you fucking kidding me!?” She yelps out as she pushes the door open. Shawn’s got his back to her, pulling his white shirt over his head and he spins around with wide eyes. Lola’s glare drops and her own blue eyes widen, watering just as quickly and her shoulder sag.

She covers her mouth with her hands. He’s got a black eye and a cut eyebrow. His sunkissed stomach is bruising and her breathing is caught in her throat. Shawn drops the shirt on the bed and scratches at the back of his neck, his muscles taut and she can’t look away.

“Shawn,” She gasps out as she stretches for him, delicate fingertips pressing on his bruised torso but he pulls away with a hiss. Lola stares at him in grief and drops her hands to her side. “Why did you do that?” She asks breathlessly, her chest rising and falling and it burns her to see him like that.

He stares at her for a while, doesn’t understand why she’s so upset, so worried about him. He supposes it’s because she’s just a nice person, but another part of him, deep down, prays to God that she cares for another reason.

He shrugs, takes a step closer and brushes a strand of hair from her face—doesn’t want her to think he’s being cold by brushing her off just seconds prior. Shawn finally gets a good look at her. Summer dress and tennis shoes with that florist’s apron wrapped around her front. Just like the first time they met. Shawn beams, heart ricocheting. He thinks back to the first time he saw her, how he  _supposed_ she was pretty. He looks at her now and sees the stars. Like she’s got this glowing tint around her silhouette and Shawn swears she’s the most precious fucking thing he’s ever seen.

“He treated you like shit, Lo.” There he goes again, with the Goddamn nicknames. She stares up at him like he’s the unknown eighth wonder of the world and she feels like her heart might leap out of her throat any second. “Wasn’t going to let him get away with it.” His voice dies off into a whisper.

Their noses are almost touching and neither of them are quite sure how they’ve grown this close without moving. Shawn’s still got his fingers in her hair, twirling the soft curls around and she’s unknowingly nuzzling into his touch. Lola’s eyes flutter closed, feels like she’s on cloud nine and she’s struggling so fucking hard to keep her lips off his and her heart beats erratically.

Shawn eyes her, watches the way her lashes gently flutter and he’s about to lean in, about to allow himself to taste her one more time, and then his phone rings. It’s an obnoxious blaring that breaks them apart and Lola’s eyes look to the bed, reading the name that lights up the screen with the incoming call.

_Corina x_

Lola feels her heart sink, knew it was too good to be true. As if someone like  _him_ could ever be interested in someone like  _her_. She feels a bubble of hurt in her stomach and she swallows her insecurities, spinning on her feet and leaving Shawn alone to stare at the phone on his bed.

He closes his eyes when he hears Lola leave, a sigh slipping from his lips and he pinches at the bridge of his nose, feels so fucking stupid. He picks up the phone, raising it to his ear. “What?” he spits out through gritted teeth, hand in his unruly curls and he tugs.

She invites him over, in that sickly sweet voice that he’s growing to hate lately. But it’s dripping with sex and he can tell she’s wet just by the way she’s breathing down the phone. Shawn’s mind falls on Lola for a moment, wonders if this is something he should be doing. But he isn’t with Lola, they’re not a thing,  _not even close_ , and Shawn knows he needs to stop himself from imagining them as such.

“I’ll be there in ten.” He grumbles into the phone, shoving it in the pocket of his sweatpants and he struggles to put a shirt back on. Shawn shoves his feet into a pair of nearby sneakers, grabbing his keys and a jacket on the way out of his bedroom.

Shawn bounces down the stairs, little Shawn growing more and more excited the closer he gets to have her lips wrapped around him, but that lovely image is quickly torn from his mind when he sees Lola speaking softly to a man with a familiar head of curls. Shawn frowns, takes slow and easy steps down the stairs and he can smell the cologne he grew up with.

Lola looks past him and up at Shawn, a blush on her cheeks and she smiles softly. He notices and spins around, an unimpressed look on his face and Shawn gulps, brows still furrowed.

“Dad?”

“You’ve got some explaining to do, Shawn.”


	7. Part 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Manny sees enough to know there’s more than meets the eye and he isn’t about to let his son lose something that may become more and Shawn slowly comes to his senses.

Shopping bags smack at their thighs with every step they take, but both young ladies have blocked that out since they walked past Claire’s seventeen minutes ago. It’s quiet for a Tuesday afternoon and Lola’s quite thankful for it. She’s got her arm linked with Maisee’s as they pass the water fountain and slowly window-shop their afternoon away.

Lola’s been blabbering non-stop since they left the house this morning. She’s told Maisee all the juicy details of the kiss, the way he held her and touched her. Maisee looked like she was about to combust with happiness and Lola tried her hardest to calm her friend down, but that didn’t stop her from screaming it at the top of her lungs.

“But, who’s Corina?” Maisee huffs, brows furrowed and Lola tries to hide her disappointment but it’s no use, Maisee knows her like the back of her hand. She pinches Lola’s arm and gives her a look, a look that tells her to stop comparing herself to someone she doesn’t even know. Lola rolls her eyes.

“Did he meet her?” she asks quietly, like she’s afraid to mention the mystery girl again in case Lola bursts into tears or breaks someone’s arm. Lola shakes her head with a sigh instead. “I think he was going to, but his dad showed up,” Lola explains with a little shrug of her shoulders.

“Is he hot? He  _must_ be hot, Shawn’s hot… he has to get his looks from somewhere,” Maisee mutters to herself, nibbling on her red stained bottom lip at the thought and Lola cringes beside her. “First of all, ew, gross. Second of all, he’s just… just a  _dad_.” She doesn’t really know how else to describe the older man, other than that Shawn’s the spitting image of him.

“Whatever, I’m ninety-three per cent sure Shawn’s into you,” Maisee concludes, shoulders shrugging and she’s got that look on her face that says  _this isn’t up for discussion,_  and Lola just sighs. “What was his dad doing there anyway?” She asks again as they make their way to the parking lot, swarmed by darkness and sharp headlights of the cars that drive past.

Lola shrugs again. That seems to be all she’s doing today. “Probably because Shawn got into that fight with Liam. Everyone knows about it,” Lola mumbles out, worried that her name is attached to it and she doesn’t want to be associated with what happened, even if it  _did_ happen because of her.

“ _That_  is a prime example of him having feels for you,” Maisee points out as Lola digs through her purse for her keys. She pretends to ignore Maisee’s comment like she doesn’t hear it, but part of Lola  _wants_ to believe her, wants it to be true. Lola shakes the thought from her head and unlocks the car, trunk popping open and they throw their bags inside.

“Where to? Wanna come do grocery shopping with me?” Maisee asks. Lola looks at her with squinted eyes, knows Maisee  _fucking hates_  doing the grocery shop on her own, but Maisee also knows she doesn’t have a choice. Lola shakes her head as she starts the engine, watches Maisee throw her head back with a drastic groan and whine.

“But… my car’s in the garage, remember? How am I meant to get to the store and bring all the stuff back?” Maisee argues, hopes that she might be able to guilt Lola into it, but she’s not taking Maisee’s bullshit. “Then it’s a good thing I’m letting you borrow my car.” She grins, pulling out of their parking space while Maisee wails.

* * *

He’s got a beer in his hand as he stares at the tree at the back of the garden. It’s hot,  _too hot_ , actually, and his shirt is long forgotten as sweat begins to pool in the little divots of flesh that sculpt his abs. They sit together in silence, father and son, and it’s eating at Shawn… just wants to know where he stands.

After Manny showed up last night, Lola had left them both to themselves where he gave Shawn the Dad Look and sat him down in the kitchen, told him he needs he to get his act together or else. Shawn knew the threat wasn’t empty, so it was also no surprise when Manny told him he was staying for a few days to keep an eye on him.

Subsequently, this meant no sex for Shawn.

Manny’s sitting beside him, shirt by his feet and he’s got his arms behind his head as he relaxes in the sun lounger. He’s got a full chest of hair, something he always told Shawn made him a man when Shawn was younger, and sweat begins to glisten on his sunkissed skin. He’s relaxed, a beer beside him and a little smile on his lips, eyes hidden behind his black tinted sunglasses.

“How’s Mum and ‘Liyah?” Shawn breaks the silence, voice a little raspy after not speaking a word for over an hour and Manny hums at the mention of his beloved ladies. “They’re good. Maybe you’d know that if you called once in a while,” he quips and Shawn closes his eyes, knows his Dad is right and nods his head.

Manny feels bad. He shouldn’t, because what he said is true… but he knows his son, and he knows how much Shawn loves his Mum and sister. He also knows that Shawn distances himself for his family when he feels himself spiralling, or feels like he’s a disappointment. Manny doesn’t tell Shawn that’s the real reason he’s here… to remind him he is loved.

“Mom’s okay, she misses you,” Manny says, Shawn nodding with a hint of a smile on his lips. He misses her, more than anything. And he knows she’s only an hours drive away, but he doesn’t think he can face her. Doesn’t want to disappoint her.

“And your sister… well, she’s sixteen going on twenty-five and I can’t keep up,” Manny laughs out, eyes crinkling behind his glasses and Shawn does the same. If anyone were to walk past, they’d probably think they were looking at the same person, just twenty-five years apart.

It’s silent again for a brief moment when their laughter dies down and Shawn’s left in his thoughts. Manny chews on his bottom lip, stares at the grass. “You gotta get your shit together, Shawn.” He mumbles out to his son, doesn’t miss the way Shawn’s head whips round to face him but Manny keeps his focus on the green grass across the garden. “You want to pursue music but you’re not gonna get anywhere with it if you get kicked out of this place. I’m serious, Shawn. What’s going on with you?” Shawn looks away.

He thinks about Manny’s words, knows he’s right,  _like always_ , and it  _hurts_. It hurts to be the family disappointment. “I don’t know,” he whispers out, brows knitted together and he picks at his bruising knuckles, doesn’t wanna look at his Dad and see the sadness on his face.

Manny sighs and sits up, legs hanging over the side of the chair and he leans his elbows on his knees. “We’re always going to be proud of you, Shawn. You’re my son, and I love you. You just gotta figure out what’s going on in your head. You’re not seventeen anymore. It’s time to grow up.” It isn’t a lecture or a telling off, it’s advice, solid advice that Shawn needs to follow.

He nods and tilts his head, smiles through pursed lips and Manny smacks him on the back of his shoulder in a loving matter. “Now enough of this sappy shit, go get me another beer.” Manny smacks him again as he swings his legs back onto the sunlounger and relaxes, Shawn’s sweet laughter music to his ears and he can’t remember the last time he heard his boy laugh like that. It’s nice.

Shawn’s still smiling to himself when he wanders into the kitchen through the back patio doors, giggling softly when he opens the fridge and pulls out to cool cans of Corona. He kicks the door shut, about to go back into the garden when he hears the front door open and the muffled voice of Lola call out, “Anyone home? Little help!”

He spins and approaches the door, watches as she’s weighed down by at least twelve shopping bags and she struggles to keep the door from closing on her with the side of her foot. “Oh, shit, Lo.” His eyes widen at her struggle and he quickly places the beers on the counter behind him, racing to her and taking the majority of her bags from her quivering arms.

Lola sighs out in appreciation and kicks the door shut, shoving the bags to the floor and Shawn does the same. She pushes her straightened locks from her hair and lets out a breath, looking up and Shawn and drinking him in.  _God, he looks so good,_  she thinks and forces herself to look away from his sweating torso.

“You okay, honey?” he asks with a soft laugh, a small smile beaming on her lips and she nods breathlessly, wiping her clammy hands on her ripped jeans. “Yeah, Maisee had me drag all this in because I wouldn’t do the grocery shop with her,” Lola explains and Shawn rolls his eyes in the nicest way he can.

“She knows the rules,” he replies and Lola raises her eyebrows, nodding in agreement but they both know that doesn’t make a difference. “You been sunbathing?” she asks with a soft laugh, wandering into the kitchen. Shawn walks behind her and nods, clearing his throat when he realises she doesn’t see the reply.

“Yeah, it’s nice out,” he says, scratching the back of his neck when he sees her reach up to grab a glass from the cupboard. She turns and smiles at him when she gets it, running the tap and she squints her eyes, smile only growing. Shawn squints back at her, a nervous smile on his face and he wonders why she’s looking at him like that.

“What?” he asks cautiously and she shakes her head, filling her glass and shutting the water off. “Your hair looks good like that.” Lola grins, eyes up the black headband he’s using to keep his curls from falling in his face and Shawn blushes like crazy when he realises. He purses his lips to hide his grin and Lola splutters into her glass of water as she tries to take a sip.

Shawn shakes his head and reaches for the fruit bowl. “Oh, you’re so funny, aren’t you, honey,” he teases as he picks off a single grape, throwing it at her forehead and they both shriek when it bounces off and into her glass of water. Shawn giggles as he walks closer, takes her hand in his that holds the glass. She stares at him as he dips his fingers into her eater and pulls out the grape, popping it into his mouth and he smiles.

“Almost as sweet as you,” he mumbles and Lola can’t help but roll her eyes and splutter out a laugh. She turns and pours the rest of her water down the sink but Shawn just watches the side of her face as she tries to hide her smile.

Manny watches them both from the patio doors, his shirt back on and sunglasses sitting on the top of his head. He watches the way Shawn looks at her, the glimmer in his eyes and the ghost of a smile on his lips. He knows the look because it’s the same look he gives his wife… the love of his life.

Manny clears his throat, decides he’s seen and  _heard_ enough and Lola spins around, eyes a little wide but she relaxes when she sees who it is. “Mr. Mendes, hi,” Lola greets him with a smile and Manny nods his head at her. “Hey, Lola,” he smiles back and Shawn watches from across the room.

He reaches for the beers and takes a few steps closer until he’s behind Lola, towering over her. “You comin’?” He asks her softly, feels her side brush against him when she turns and she smiles gratefully but shakes her head. “No, I’ve gotta got work in ten and then I’m at the diner until close,” she explains with pursed lips. Shawn nods, heart aching and this time, Shawn knows what it is. Disappointment.

“Anyways, I gotta go. See you guys later.” Lola bids them goodbye before she slips past Shawn and jumps up the stairs two at a time, heading to her bedroom to grab her apron and diner uniform, and she’s out the front door just seconds after.

* * *

It’s almost 5 p.m. and Lola is tired. The flower shop has been quiet, the regular old man Mike coming in at three for flowers for his wife, a couple of party planners and young girl buying flowers for her mother. Lola’s feet are starting to ache but if she acknowledges it now, it’ll make her seven-hour shift at the diner hell. She’s removing thorns from a bunch of roses at the counter when she hears the little bell above the door sound.

She looks up and places the clippers on the counter, a small smile on her lips when she sees who it is. “Hi,” she beams, happy to have some sort of human interaction after sitting in the shop alone for almost an hour. Manny smiles and makes his way to the counter and Lola notices the sparkle in his eyes. The same sparkle as Shawn.

“What can I get you?” she asks politely, hands leaning on the counter and Manny takes a second to appreciate the beautiful flowers that decorate the shop. “I go back home tomorrow, wanna get some flowers for my lady.” He tells her, aks for the brightest and prettiest bunch of flowers she can.

Lola grins and accepts the challenge, leaves the counter to pick different flowers from pre-assembled bunches and she brings back more than enough to the counter. Manny watches the small smile on her face as she picks and places them together, cutting most down to size.

 _She’s not like Shawn’s normal type,_  Manny thinks. Shawn’s never had a thing for redheads before, at least not that Manny knows of anyway. She’s a sweet girl, seems to have her head on straight and he knows she’s serious about her education and life in general. Manny thinks she’s exactly what Shawn needs and his heart bursts a little.

“So, how long have you been seeing my boy?” He asks out of the blue and Lola almost snips the tip of her finger off. She places the scissors down and lets out a shaky, breathy laugh. She clears her throat and places the flowers onto the counter, looking up at the older man and he stares at her, expectantly.

“No, uh… we’re not..” she trails off, but Manny raises his eyebrows higher, not buying her excuse. “We’re friends, known each other about two months now.” She defends, though she isn’t sure why she feels so defensive, like she  _needs_ to make him believe what she’s saying.

Manny nods and squints at her, humming an “mhm” like he knows something she doesn’t. “What?” she laughs awkwardly, a blush sitting on the apples of her cheeks and Manny just smiles at her, like he’s so proud and thankful, but all Lola is, is confused.

He shakes his head. “Nothing…” she knows he has more to say, so she raises her brows and he huffs. “Just that in all the twenty years I’ve raised Shawn, I’ve never known him to use endearing nicknames… and I heard him call you two in a matter of ten seconds back in the house.” Lola blushes, sinks into herself a little at his words and she doesn’t know what to do or say.

“Not to mention he looks at you the way I look at the love of my life, but hey, what does an old man like me know.” He smiles kindly and Lola begins to spiral deep in her thoughts, unable to come up with a believable excuse and her mouth runs dry, heart thumping like there’s no tomorrow as she mindlessly finishes assembling Manny’s bouquet. She places it on the counter as many drops a twenty beside it, taking the bouquet in his hands and smelling the flowers.

“Thank you for the flowers, Lola.” He smiles at her, but she’s completely frozen in her spot, brows furrowed slightly and Manny spins around, reaching for the door when she finally snaps out of the daze she put herself in.

“Manny!” She calls out before he has the chance to open the door, his namer a pleasant shock and he raises his brows at her. She scuffs her feet behind the counter. “What do you mean Shawn doesn’t do nicknames? Why not?” She asks, curious, and the question alone tells Manny everything he needs to know.

He smiles at the girl. “To Shawn, nicknames mean attachment, and Shawn’s never let himself get attached to anyone.” He explains, voice soft and barely audible but Lola hears and hands onto every word he utters. Before she can even process them and ask him something else, the door is chiming and he’s gone.

* * *

It’s past one when Lola stumbles into the house. Her feet are completely raw and her legs are frozen after walking home from the diner in a yellow miniskirt. She closes the front door behind her, kicking off her tennis shoes and rubbing the sleep from beneath her eyes. She’s shrugging her jacket off when she hears it from upstairs—the yelling and stomping.

She frowns and hangs her jacket on the wall, small steps leading her to the bottom of the stairs. A tall blonde, well, taller than Lola, comes bounding down the stairs, her jeans half buttoned and shirt all messed up. She’s furious, red in the face and gritting her teeth. Lola’s about to ask if she’s okay when she shoves into her and almost knocks her flying.

Shawn’s bounding down the stairs just as quick, catching Lola’s arm before she can hit the floor and pulling her into him. Her palm presses against his bare chest, feels the fine hairs that decorate his skin and she’s overwhelmed and confused. It’s not until she puts the pieces together that she realises the girl is Corina and her and Shawn have clearly just ended their night in a different way than planned.

Corina notices the lingering touch they share and the way he stares at her, eyes frantic like he’s making sure there’s not a scratch on her, and she scoffs. She stares at Lola in disgust, knows who she is and she can’t help but stare at her clothes, blood boiling. “Of course she’s a fucking waitress.” And Lola’s offended, doesn’t understand what she’s done to get the sharp end of this.

Just as quickly as she spits the words, she’s running out of the door and leaving it wide open. Shawn says nothing, doesn’t follow her, just closes and locks the door before turning back to Lola. “You okay? Did she hurt you?” He asks gently, reaching for her again and she shakes her head, cuddling into herself out of coldness and confusion.

“What was all that about?” she breathes softly, doe eyes staring up at him and he’s suddenly blushing, scratching the back of his neck, which Lola has learnt to be a nervous habit of his. “We… got into an argument. I don’t think I’ll be seeing her again.” He admits and Lola tries to hide the giddiness she gets from his words. _He won’t be seeing her again._

“Oh.” Is all she says, wiggling her toes in her ankle socks and Shawn rocks back and forth on the balls of his feet. It’s awkward, like she came home at the wrong time and saw something she wasn’t supposed to, and Lola doesn’t know what to do. So she stands there with pursed lips.

“How was work?” Shawn asks, breaking the silence and Lola nods her head. She debates whether or not she should tell him she saw his dad, whether she should mention anything about the whole nickname situation. She doesn’t. Instead, she says, “It was okay,” and leaves it like that.

Shawn nods his head and they’re back to that stupid silence again. Neither of them can understand why they’re being so weird about what just happened, it’s not like they kissed…  _again_.

“Anyway, I’m super tired, so… I’m gonna head to bed,” she tells him, jabbing her thumb over her shoulder and Shawn’s so fucking thankful she’s ending this weird conversation. He nods, bids her goodnight as she slowly creeps up the stairs. He watches her up, offers her a wave when she looks back at him over her shoulder and pinches the bridge of his nose when she’s out of sight.

“Jesus Christ.”


	8. Part 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She’s reached the age of twenty-one and Lola assumed she was done making rash decisions, but like always, Lola was wrong.

There’s nothing worse than having a perfect dream and being abruptly torn from it. Lola learns that the hard way when her obnoxious phone blares out her ringtone. She blindly reaches for her nightstand, eyes struggling to adjust to the light that filters through her room and Lola lets out a loud groan, forgetting the field of daisies and the boy that ran with her.

She grabs her phone, accepts the call without looking at the caller and brings it to her ear. “Hello?” She lets out groggily, brows pinched and her head sinks further into her duck feathered pillow. A screech is heard from the other line and Lola pulls her phone away from her ear with a wince.

“Happy twenty-first, baby!” It’s her mom, she knows it. Lola grins sleepily to herself, stretching her tired limbs and she brings the phone back to her ear. “Thanks, mom,” she raps out softly, eyes still struggling to adjust to the morning light and her stomach flips.

“What are you doing today? I’m sorry I can’t be there to celebrate with you, honey,” Cindy rambles on. Lola knows she’s probably holding back her tears and beating herself up about it, but she wishes she wouldn’t. Wishes Cindy believed her when she says it’s okay.

“It’s alright, mom. And I don’t know… I’m not sure if Maisee’s got anything planned or not,” Lola shrugs, but part of her kind of hopes they make a small fuss. She wouldn’t mind pancakes for breakfast and maybe take out in the evening.

“I’m sure she does, you know what Maisee’s like.” Cindy laughs, considers her to be a second daughter and Lola laughs too. It’s quiet for a brief moment and they both bask in the comfort of just knowing they’re somewhat together.

“I’m really sorry I can’t make it this weekend,” Cindy continues to apologize. Lola sighs and pinches the bridge of her nose, shaking her head and she just wants her mom to understand that  _she_ understands.

Lola knows her mother is a hard worker, knows she’s never had anything just handed to her and Cindy has brought Lola up the same way. Lola grew up watching her mother fight for what they had, work seventeen-hour shifts just to make sure there was enough food on the table and to buy Lola the books she needed for school.

Lola watched her mother claw her way up the nursing ladder for years, comforted her on the nights she’d come home in tears after losing a patient, cooking her dinner at three in the morning when she got home from a long shift. Lola was her mothers’ mother and they were each other’s best friends.

“Mom, stop… I’m coming back to Kingston in a few weeks for spring break anyway, it’s okay, it’s just a birthday,” Lola shrugs it off and Cindy knows her daughter’s being completely honest. They’ve never lied to each other and Lola wasn’t about to start now.

She hears Cindy sigh from the other line and a little smile graces Lola’s lips.  _She won_. “Okay, you win. Your card should come in the mail today and you get your presents when you come home. That okay?” Lola smiles and sits herself up in bed, rubbing the sleep from her eyes and she can only imagine the mess her hair must be.

“That’s perfect, mom,” she sighs out.

“Okay, I’m gonna go. I got my final assessment in an hour and I need to get to work. Have a great birthday, baby. I love you!” Cindy sends kisses down the phone.

Lola laughs. “Bye, mom. Good luck, let me know how it goes. Love you!” They end the call and Lola throws her phone to the empty right side of her bed, sinking back into her pillow and she blows a few strands of hair out of her face.

Twenty-one and she doesn’t feel any fucking different.

Her morning routine is the same. Lola gets out of bed and uses the bathroom, washes her face and brushes her teeth, makes her bed and has a quick shower. She dresses in a flowy, yellow summer dress and slips her feet into her Converse. Lola lets her natural waves cascade past her shoulders and down her back as she fills in her brows and coats a layer of mascara to her light lashes.

She’s bounding down the stairs soon after, tucking hair behind her ear. It’s quiet, only soft mumbles in the kitchen from her housemates. Lola reaches the bottom of the stairs when she notices the lack of banners and balloons. Part of her is thankful no one has made a big deal out of it, but another part of her feels a little disappointed.

Lola makes her way through the foyer and into the kitchen with a beaming smile, a little skip in her step but no one acknowledges her presence. There’s no birthday cards or a smiley group of friends. There’s no pancakes.

Lola purses her lips. “Morning,” she mumbles out, swaying on the balls and heels of her feet and everyone mutters out a ‘hi,’ in the most disinterested way possible. Maisee’s got her head in her phone as she picks at her cereal. Dean and Raegen are too busy whispering like children with small smiles on their faces. Mackey and Oliver are half asleep on the counter and Shawn’s sitting across from them all, earphones in and his MacBook on his lap.

“You got mail, by the way,” Maisee waves her hand to the front door, not bothering to look up from her phone and a very heavy sinking feeling sits in the pit of Lola’s stomach.  _They forgot about her birthday_. Lola nods and quietly thanks her, feet shuffling back to the front door and she picks up the three letters addressed from her.

She stares at them, knows the cursive writing on the first one if from her grandma and grandpa, the one with the writing that resembles hers is from her mother, and the one with the printed text right off the computer is from her father. She’s shocked  _he_ remembered.

Lola shakes her head and takes a minute to compose herself, throws the cards back onto the little entry table and clears her throat. She shouldn’t be upset that her friends forgot her birthday, she’s never liked a fuss made of her anyway,  _she shouldn’t be upset._

Lola tugs her sundress down her hips a little, wiggles her toes and wanders back into the kitchen. No one pays much mind to her, save for Shawn, who peers up at her with lidded eyes but she misses the curious squint he offers.

She grabs a bottle of water from the fridge and bumps it closed with her hip. “What’s everyone doing today?” she asks as she uncaps her water. She earns a collection of mumbles that she somewhat translates to 'nothing much,’ and Lola gnaws on her bottom lip.

Shawn watches her, notices the harsh disappointment on her soft features and he’s so confused as to what’s going through her head. He wants to ask her, pull her aside and make sure everything’s okay, but they haven’t spoken in four days, since that whole situation with Corina, and he’s beginning to think he’s done something to upset her.

He hasn’t spoken to Corina, either. Blocked her number and deleted her on any socials he had her on. He took his dad’s advice, started a fresh. Shawn’s been focusing on his school work and writing songs for Professor Mayer the past few days and if he’s being honest, he feels good.

“Okay,” Lola says to herself, pops her cap back on the water and she purses her lips. “Well, I’m going to work. Guess I’ll just see you all later,” she mumbles, eyes downcast and Shawn’s almost fucking certain he sees her bottom lip quiver a little.

* * *

It’s been a shit day, to say the least. The milkshake machine threw up on Lola within the first ten minutes of her shift starting, and her stupid boss refused to let her go home to change. She’s been verbally abused by customers all afternoon, a bunch of bikers riding through town and trying to cop a feel while she was waiting on them.

She’s felt icky all day and she just wants to go home, shower, and forget about the complete and utter disaster of her forgotten twenty-first birthday. She’s close to tears when she parks outside the house and the Nissan stinks of banana split.

Her grandparents called her on her break, wished her love and happiness, and she’s still to hear from her father, but that much is expected. Lola’s kicking the rubble beneath her feet when she makes her way up the steps to the porch. The lights are off and she supposes everyone’s out. It’s 10 p.m. on a Saturday night, there’s no reason for them to be home, and Lola’s thankful for the chance to cry in peace.

But when she pushes through the door and flicks the light on, there are bodies jumping out from every hidden corner, balloons on the ceiling and party poppers are going off in her face. Lola lets out a frantic scream, hands covering her face and she can hear music and laughter.

She squints her eyes open, heart dropping and stomach swirling. “Happy 21st, Lola!” Maisee screams at the top of her lungs, pretty dress holding her hips and Lola feels severely underdressed. Maisee pulls her into a hug, kisses her forehead and pushes her to greet her guests.

Everyone’s there. Her friends from her English study group and other classes, a few of Mackey and Olly’s friends that she’s spent time hanging with. It’s everyone she  _knows_ and she couldn’t be more grateful.

“Oh my God,” she breathes out, tears in her eyes and she swears she’s about to burst into tears. She’s pulled into hugs from everyone, chatting and drinking and dancing and she feels so fucking good, feels the thing everyone says she would. She feels  _liberated._

“Let me change, hold on,” she tells Maisee as she tries to drag Lola out to the backyard. Maisee rolls her eyes but lets her, nonetheless. Lola’s running up the stairs with a grin, untying her apron and shimmying out of her skirt in the process. She’s in only her underwear when she closes the door, making for the closet when she sees something on her nightstand.

A bouquet of trilliums sits on the surface, a tall bag of Horlicks beside it and Lola frowns as she picks up the folded flower card that leans against her lamp.

_Happy Birthday…._

_Saw the flowers and thought of u._

_Oh and I used all ur horlicks so here’s a new bag, you were right, I’m out like a light after LOL._

_Love, Shawn x_

Lola blushes, heat rising through her body and she can’t help but giggle at her gift, but she’s still thankful, nonetheless. She gently places the card back on her nightstand before rummaging through her closet, opting on a black, floral wrap dress and she’s bouncing back down the stairs.

* * *

It’s been two hours and Lola’s feeling brave. She’s drinking a little more than she knows she should (three drinks being the usual limit and she’s now on her ninth), but she’s enjoying herself. She’s wedged on the couch between Maisee and the armrest, her head on her friend’s shoulder and Maisee coos her.

“You’re so great, Mais,” Lola sighs out, eyes fluttering closed and she’s growing even more appreciatingly grateful for the little gettogether her best friend had assembled. “I know, baby,” Maisee tells her, a smirk on her lips and Lola lets out a snorted giggle.

It’s quiet for a few seconds, save for the music and the laughter of the other partygoers. Lola takes a moment to sober up a little, to sift through her thoughts and she’s only now realising that she hasn’t seen Shawn all night and she remembers the flowers on her nightstand.

“Is Shawn here?” she asks quietly. Lola feels dirty, like she shouldn’t be asking such an innocent question, and in her hazy state, Maisee nods through a yawn. “Think he’s in the yard,” she tells her and Lola hums.

She waits on the couch for a few more passing moments and nibbles on her bottom lip. She debates whether she should go through with what she wants to do… whether she actually has the guts to tell him what she needs to. But before Lola can fully comprehend those thoughts, she’s telling Maisee she needs the bathroom and she’s searching for him.

Lola weaves through her friends and acquaintances, one goal on her mind and she’s eager to tell him. She prays he feels the same, he must do. She can’t stop thinking about everything Manny told her, about the longing looks, the nicknames. Lola’s certain there’s something between them, she can feel it in her bones.

She makes her way into the kitchen, trying to suppress her beaming smile and she searches for his fluffy head of curls, knows he hasn’t been slicking them back lately, even if they have been avoiding each other since that night with Corina.

She’s on her tiptoes, surprised by how crowded the kitchen is and when she sees that mop of brown curls, her smile grows to twice its size. She can see the tight green shirt he’s wearing and the black skinny jeans, and he looks good,  _so good._

Lola’s about to move closer when the man in front of her, that was blocking her view, wanders off and she can see his pretty face so clearly. But the smile slips from her face just as quickly as it appeared as Shawn dips his head down and envelops another girl’s lips with his.

It’s like she’s drowning. Her heart sinks to the pit of her stomach, knees tingling and her throat feels like it’s closing in. Everything around her is black and white, everything but him and her. The air is being sucked out of the room and she feels that familiar feeling of impending doom crashing over her.

_You’re so stupid, Lola. He never liked you!_

She’s almost panting for air when she watches Shawn pull away, a cocky smirk on his lips and the girl beside him looks fucking gorgeous as she tries to catch her own breath. Lola knows that kiss, knows the way it makes someone’s knees buckle and head grow cloudy.

Lola doesn’t feel the tears that begin to pool in her eyes, but she feels all self-confidence quickly evade her nerves and she feels so fucking small. Shawn feels eyes on him and he doesn’t expect to see a heartbroken Lola staring right at him.

He sees the pain in her eyes and the little twitch of her lips as they curve into a frown. Shawn lets go of the girl beside him, didn’t have any interest in learning her name at the beginning of the night and he certainly doesn’t have any interest to now.

He’s focused on Lola and the way she tries her hardest to give him an encouraging smile, despite the fact that she’s fucking crumbling within herself. She nods her head and spins on the heels of her feet and Shawn doesn’t miss the frown that quickly takes over her fake smile before she’s rushing for the front door.

Shawn doesn’t say a word to the girl beside him, just brushes past her and follows Lola. Shawn doesn’t know why he chases after her or feels the need to tell her the kiss meant nothing, but he also doesn’t give himself a chance to think about it. He just needs to get to Lola.

He thinks he’s lost her when he gets to the lounge, can’t see any sign of her pretty black dress or her ginger curls but then he sees the front door slowly swing closed and he stops it before it locks, rushing outside and closing it behind him.

The air is cold, freezing, actually and he can see her shivering as she sits on the bottom steps of the front porch. Shawn purses his lips and slowly eases closer to her, sits beside her and stretches his legs out the best he can. She’s silent beside him, too busy staring at the concrete beneath them.

Lola takes a deep breath.  _It’s now or never,_  she tells herself. Shawn’s oblivious beside her. “I don’t know when I’m next gonna feel confident enough to do this, and hell, maybe I shouldn’t be doing this at all, but I need to.  _I need to_ ,” she mutters out, brows knitted like she’s trying to convince herself and Shawn can’t help but frown in confusion.

She turns around, eyes watering and he gets a good look at her. She looks distraught, but in the most fucking beautiful way possible. “Honey… what’s going on?” Shawn whispers,  doesn’t miss the way her breathing hitches in her throat and his hands are growing clammy and he’s got that uneasy feeling in his stomach again.

“I like you,” she blurts out, eyes wide and Shawn blinks. “Like,  _I wanna be with you_ , like you,” she’s whispering as her voice dies out from its confidence to uncertainty. She can hear her heart pounding heavily in her ears and Shawn clears his throat, feels like it’s about to close in on him.

He can’t believe it, it can’t be true. Shawn stares at her for a few moments, tries to find any indication that she’s joking, or if it was a spur of the moment thing, but all he can see are insecurities and pure adoration and she’s swaying just a little.

“Lola,” he begins, taking her cold, dainty hands in his huge ones and he rubs his thumb against the divots of her knuckles. “You’re drunk, hun,” he laughs lightheartedly, like he needs to believe that’s the reason she’s saying this… like he doesn’t  _deserve_ for her to mean it.

Lola shakes her head and pulls her hands out of his grasp, standing to her feet and pacing in a small circle. “No… I mean,  _maybe a little_ , but I’m still honest,” she reasons and she’s in her head again, drowning in her insecurities like every other night.

“But it’s okay, you don’t have to like me back, it’s nothing new. I don’t expect for someone as incredible as you to even glance at someone like me. It just doesn’t ever happen, I should know that by now,” Lola rambles to herself, let’s her fears and self-doubt feast on her and Shawn grabs her hand and gently tugs so she’s sitting beside him again.

She plops down, pout weighing on her pretty pink lips and Shawn brings her hands to his mouth, peppering kisses to her knuckles. “Lola,  _you_  are incredible. Not me. I don’t deserve you,” he tells her breathlessly. His heart is aching and he just wants to hold her. It’s an odd emotional reaction for Shawn, but he doesn’t question it.

“If I’m so incredible, how come no one wants me?” Lola sniffles, her nose a harsh shade of red and Shawn’s lip involuntarily pouts back at her. She doesn’t expect the impact of his soft lips on hers, but she doesn’t fight it either.

Shawn holds her rosy cheeks in the palms of his hands, suckles softly on her bottom lip and Lola loses all sense of reality. Her fingers thread through his curls as she tugs at them softly, kisses him back with all of her sloppy might and neither of them mind the taste of alcohol on the others tongues.

“ _I_ want you,” he whispers against her lips.


	9. Part 9 (Smut)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A night in leads to more than just studying and songwriting, but Lola and Shawn wouldn’t have in any other way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> smut; oral (both receiving), dirty talk, fingering, foreplay, ugh just some good shit.

“Dude, I’m telling you, it’s awesome.”

Shawn tries to bite back his beaming smile, but it’s no use. It breaks through the suppression and spreads wide across his face. His eyes are sparkling and there’s a little blush to the apples of his cheeks.  _It’s awesome._

“You’re sure? I’m a big boy, I can take some criticism,” Shawn interjects, doesn’t want to believe his first piece can be  _that_ good. Professor Mayer throws his head back with an obnoxious laugh.

Shawn stares at his computer screen for a few moments before John talks again. “I’m on vacay in  _Hawaii_ , do you really think I’d Skype you if I didn’t think your music slapped?” he quips and Shawn raises his hands in surrender and lets out a lighthearted giggle.

It’s 3 p.m. in Hawaii and Shawn can see the palm trees swaying shadows against the wall behind his professor from the screen. It’s 9 p.m. in Canada and everyone’s left the house to attend one of the biggest parties on campus. Shawn declined when the boys asked him if he was going, he’s finally setting his priorities straight.

He’s about to ask another question when Lola wanders past his room, head buried in a book and Shawn quickly bids his professor a goodbye before shutting off his laptop and shoving it on his nightstand. “Lola!” he calls out, watches her slowly walk backwards until she’s within his view.

Lola closes her book and leans against the doorframe, a small, genuine smile on her lips and Shawn smiles back, his heart stammering. “Hey. How’s the songwriting coming along?” she asks softly. Shawn stares at her for a while. She’s wearing cotton shorts and a sweater, hair cascading past her shoulders in natural waves and her smile is glowing.

Shawn shakes his head and squeezes his eyes shut, pretends his head is hurting and he looks back up at her. She hasn’t said a thing about the party since it happened, and that was three days ago. She acts like she never told him she has feelings for him… like she doesn’t remember the kiss.

“Yeah, uh… It’s going good,” he tells her. Lola nods her head and smiles through pursed lips, book clutched to her chest. Shawn squints at her. “Studying instead of partying?” he asks, nodding at the  _Jane Eyre_  book in her arms and she blushes. “You should know me by now,” she remarks.

 _Yeah_ , he thinks,  _I should._

They’re both silent for a few seconds, silly smiles on their faces and Lola clears her throat, scratches just behind her ear in nervous habit. “Anyways, I’ll be downstairs if you need me,” she tells him, jabs her thumb over her shoulder and Shawn does that stupid fucking wave again.

When she’s out of sight, Shawn falls back into the pillows on his bed, hand smacking against his forehead and he lets out a groan. He wonders for a moment if he should ask her, ask if she really doesn’t remember the kiss. But then Shawn remembers it’s probably not the best decision to make, and he thinks, fuck it.

He stretches out his limbs and follows her path down the stairs. His breathing is uneven and he can feel uncomfortable beads of sweat dot at the nape of his neck when he enters the kitchen. Lola’s bent over, searching for something in the freezer and her ass looks  _amazing_  in those short shorts.

Shawn nibbles down on his bottom lip, can only imagine the way she’d look without the fabric covering her skin and he feels a little lightheaded for a brief moment. The swell of her ass is perfectly rounded, the fabric lining her cheeks just right and Shawn’s throat grows dry.

He looks away as she stands back up, closing the freezer and tearing the wrapper off her ice pop and she squeezes the bottom of it, pushing the sweet treat up and she sucks on it softly. Shawn just about comes his pants.

“Hey, you okay?” she asks with an innocent smile,  _that fucking smile_. Lola sits back on her stool, rearranging her papers and Shawn shakes his head, takes a deep breath and he decides he can’t fucking take it anymore.

He leans his hands on the opposite side of the counter, dipping his head to look her in her pretty little doe eyes and she pulls the ice pop out of her lips with a  _pop_. “Do you really not remember what you said to me on your birthday?” he asks, voice nothing but a full course meal and Lola stills, blushes profusely.

 _She knows,_  he thinks.

“What?” she squeaks out, her taken tone enough to convince Shawn she knew the  _whole_ time. He squints at her as he rounds the corner of the island and swivels her on the stool. Her ice pop is resting on the counter and he’s prying her legs open with his knees. Her heart is stammering in her chest and she’s sure if she was wearing her smartwatch, it’d be calling the emergency services for a heart attack.

He cups her cheeks in his palms, can feel the heat of them as she blushes harder but he doesn’t say anything on the matter. Lola’s eyes are wide, plump lips parted and Shawn nibbled on his bottom one. “I need to know the truth,” he whispers breathlessly, eyes scanning her face for a telling sign. “Do you like me, Lola?”

She’s terrified, so fucking scared to admit her feels without that boost of confidence the alcohol gave her. But his face is moving closer to hers and she’s struggling to catch her breath when the tip of his nose bumps against hers and she can taste the mint on his breath.

“Tell me you didn’t feel anything when we kissed,” he breathes.

Lola stares at his lips, how fucking soft and sweet they are, how bad she craves to feel them on hers again. “Tell me it didn’t mean anything,” his voice wavers and she stares up in his eyes.

“You know it did,” she whispers back, voice heavy and Shawn feels his heart flutter, a relieved smile tugging on his lips and he moves closer, his mouth almost on hers. “Then say it. Baby, please,” he’s whispering and his lips are ghosting hers. “I need to know I’m not going out of my mind.”

Lola’s silent for a second, a thousand thoughts swimming through her mind all at once and she can’t focus on anything but how close his lips are and the three words she just needs to utter out. But she thinks of what could happen if it’s just a spur of the moment thing, that he won’t feel the same in the morning. But she’s twenty-one now and she’s sick of living her life safe.

“I want you.”

The air shifts and everything seems heavier. Their lips are touching but they’re not kissing, just idly caressing each other as he awaits her final words. His breath tickles her lip and she swallows back the nerves and doubts that are trying to eat at her mind.

“I  _like_ you.”

Shawn closes his eyes for a second, her words all but music to his fucking ears and he kisses her like he’s never kissed anyone before. It’s soft and passionate yet needy and it ignites a fire within her that she never knew she had. Her arms snake around his neck, fingers furiously tugging at his curls and he  _fucking loves it._

Shawn’s hands roam from her cheeks down the sides over her body, his mind on overdrive and he dips his knees, just enough to loop her thighs on top of his and lift her from the seat. Lola’s legs are wrapped around his middle, Shawn’s lips working on hers as he spins them around and pins Lola to the wall.

She’s clinging to him, lips eager and he suckles on her bottom lip, internally growling at the soft whine that slips past her lips. His mind is spinning, can’t fucking believe he’s kissing her and Lola is too caught in the moment to realise this isn’t just a fantasy anymore.

With his eyes closed and lips locked on hers, Shawn manages to carry them up the stairs and into his room. Lola doesn’t realise until he’s carefully dropping her onto his plush mattress, dragging his lips across her jaw and down her neck until he’s standing at the foot of the bed staring down at her.

Lola’s lips are completely swollen as she pants for breath, doe eyes anything but innocent and her hair is a mess. She looks completely fucked, laying in his bed with her legs spread wide, chest heaving and he knows she’s not wearing a bra.

Shawn takes a moment to appreciate her, tries to compose himself and catch his breath. He wonders if he should actually take things further, doesn’t want for either of them to regret it in the morning but Lola makes that decision for him when she crawls to the edge of the bed, standing on her knees and her soft palms are on his chest, smoothing over his cotton shirt.

He’s in shock for a hot second, can’t comprehend how  _Lola Davenport_ , the innocent English major that blushes at any compliment, is on her  _knees_ , gnawing on her bottom lip as she seduces him.  _What are the fucking odds._

“Now, it’s your turn,” Lola breathes, swallowing back her nerves and she feels  _so fucking brave_. She stares up at him, doe eyes and all.  _It’s now or never_ , she thinks. “Tell me  _you_ didn’t feel anything when we kissed,” she mutters out, eyes glued to his lips and Shawn balls his fists by his sides, struggles to control himself.

“You know I did,” he just about manages to utter out, words strained like her hand is around his throat, but it isn’t. Her hands are resting on his sweatpants, fingers sneaking beneath the fabric of his shirt and her nails gently scratch on his hips.

“Then say it,” Lola whispers in his ear, breath hot on his neck and he lets out an involuntary groan. He’s straining in his pants, of that much he’s certain, and he can almost smell how fucking soaked she is.

“I can’t,” Shawn tenses, eyes squeezed shut but Lola’s smiling up at him, lips so full, and Shawn’s dead certain she looks like a complete and utter angel. But oh, if the heavens above knew what they were destined to do.

“It’s just me, Shawn,” she breathes encouragingly. Her hand is around the back of his neck, gently toying with his curls and his eyes flutter open, falling on her. She’s breathtaking, completely fucking mesmerising and there’s something about her blown eyes and swollen lips that tells Shawn he’s about to see the real side of her.

“I’m here and I want you,” her voice is barely above a whisper and she shuffles closer on her knees, nose bumping his. “No matter how slow we take things,” Lola tries to reassure him and she knows this is difficult for him, admitting his feelings, and Lola just prays she hasn’t got the wrong end of the stick.

“Unless… unless  _you_ don’t want  _me_ , of course,” she mumbles hurridly, like she’s quickly taking back everything she’s just poured out in the realisation that maybe he  _doesn’t actually_ feel the same.

Shawn notices, picks up on the falter of confidence in her voice and now it’s his turn to convince her otherwise, to cup her soft cheeks in his warm palms and force her to look at him. “Hey, no… I do, I do want…” it’s like he’s choking on his words, like he physically can’t utter them but  _the want_ to is enough to soothe Lola’s doubts.

“It’s okay,” she whispers, hand caressing the side of his face and her thumb gently brushes over the soft skin of his cheekbone. “You don’t have to say it, just… just  _show me_ ,” she bargains, and by the spark in his eye, she knows that’s one thing he  _can_ do.

He licks his lips and crashes his mouth into her. It’s rushed but so fucking soft. Their lips mould together in perfect unison and Lola whimpers into the kiss. She pulls away, gasping and soaked, tugging on the hem of his shirt and Shawn soon gets the hint, lifts it over his head and throws it somewhere across the room.

He’s ripped, so fucking toned and Lola feels herself begin to gush. She runs her hands up his body, lips pressing open-mouthed kisses across his warm skin and she swirls her tongue around the divots of the flesh of his abs and scratches at his back. Shawn’s in shock, eyes rolling to another dimension and he can’t believe where this is coming from.

Shawn grows angsty, wants to know what else she can do with that tongue of hers and his fingers pinch her chin, gently pulls her up so her face is just about level with his and he can feel her panting breath against his mouth.

And just like that, he shoves his lips against hers, suckles on her sweetness and his mind grows hazy. His hands are all over her body, gripping on her hips and she’s tugging on his hair, hungry for more. Shawn can’t take it, his senses on overdrive and he grabs the backs of her knees before he shoves her against the mattress, her body bouncing slightly.

She stares up at him with lust-filled eyes, lips parted as she struggles to catch her breath again. Her breasts are full beneath her shirt, Shawn can see the way they bounce as she falls and her legs are spread just right. Lola’s grinning with an angry blush to her cheeks, mind telling her to shy away but she doesn’t want to.

She feels good, confident, doesn’t wanna let any insecure thoughts ruin that. Shawn grins down at her, eyes blown and he’s nibbling on his lower lip as he gently caresses the soft skin of her thighs. “God, you’re so fucking gorgeous,” he breathes out, completely fucked for her.

Lola blushes and teasingly rakes her nails across his fingers before intertwining them and rubbing her thighs together to give herself some sense of relief. “Yeah?” she whispers, still refusing to shy away and Shawn grins, eyes wide and he nods his head as he slowly eases his body against hers.

“Oh, yeah,” he grins, settling between her legs and he bumps his nose against hers before Lola’s leaning up to press her lips into his. She’s hungry,  _starved_ , actually, and he’s her favourite meal. Lola wraps her legs around his waist and musters up as much strength as she can and flips them over.

She sits on his abdomen, suckling softly on his neck and Shawn’s close to passing out. He’s got his hands in her hair as she sinks further down his body, shuffling so she sits between his parted legs and she hooks her fingers in the waistband of his shorts, eyes glancing at him for confirmation.

Shawn nods his head quickly, lifting his hips for her to tug them down as Lola’s entire body quivers at the sight of him. His thick cock bounces up and slaps against his lower abdomen, begging to be fucked. Her mouth is watering, can’t seem to take her eyes off it as she pulls his shorts and underwear off his ankles.

He’s watching her with flushed cheeks, cock twitching when she licks her lips and teasingly rakes her nails up his thick thighs. “Holy shit,” she breathes, pussy pulsing and Shawn shifts on the bed, makes himself comfortable. He’s got one hand behind his head, the other cupping Lola’s chin and she gazes up at him with those innocent eyes but Shawn can see her halo shift to devil horns.

He thumbs her plump bottom lip, traces over the softness and she’s feeling more than a little bold when she parts her mouth and welcomes his thumb. He presses the pad of his finger against her warm tongue and Lola closes her lips around it, sucks softly and Shawn’s never seen anything so fucking filthy before.

“Hmm,” she hums against him, eyes fluttering closed and she blindly reaches for his cock. It twitches in her palm and she can feel the thick vein that protrudes down the base of his cock. Lola gives it a gentle squeeze, pulling off his thumb with a  _pop_ and she shuffles further down the bed.

Shawn watches her closely with wide eyes and parted lips. She gathers saliva on her tongue before she opens her mouth and lets it drip down her lip and fall directly on his pink head. Shawn whines at the sensation, jerks his hips impatiently as it drips down the long length of his member.

“Don’t be such a tease, baby,” he murmurs out huskily and he doesn’t miss the way Lola’s eyes slowly flutter shut with blushing cheeks, or how she clenches her thighs together before swirling her warm tongue around his tip. Shawn grins to himself and fights back a moan. “Oh, you like it when I call you baby, eh?” he teases, watches the way she nods her head and wraps her lips around him.

His heart swells for a moment and she suckles softly, rubs her tongue from side to side on his soft tip and Shawn throws his head back. Lola’s tracing the divots of flesh with her tongue, savouring the taste of him that isn’t all that salty but actually a little sweet. Her eyes are closed as she hums around him and pumps the base of his cock.

He’s nothing like she’s ever had before. He’s got a pretty dick, something she’s not even remotely surprised by, but she’s going to appreciate it to the fullest. He’s thicker than her others and just that little bit longer. He’s maintained and Lola’s thankful she’s not gonna be choking on pubes when she decides to deepthroat him.

Shawn can tell she’s enjoying this, more than she’d probably admit, but he doesn’t say anything on the matter — he’s too caught up in the pleasure to make a teasing remark. “Just like that,” he whispers, lifting his head to watch her. He brushes her hair from her pretty little face and holds it back and she paces herself further down his length.

Lola’s bobbing her head, soft moans sending vibrations through him and with her free hand, she cradles his balls, gently massages them with her fingers and Shawn’s throwing his head back in complete and utter disbelief. She pulls off him with a gasp, a heavy string of saliva from his tip to her lips and she spreads the wetness across his entire dick.

His member is soaked, absolutely drenched and obscene squelching sounds echo off the walls of the bedroom as she pumps him in a quickened motion. Shawn’s rutting his hips up to meet her pace, beads of sweat dotting on his hairline and he can already feel his orgasm growing threateningly closer.

“Baby, oh,  _fuck_ ,” he’s a stuttering mess when Lola wraps her lips around his balls and gently suckles them into her warm mouth, swirling her tongue around the neglected skin and humming against him. She pulls off him, pants for her breath before she’s taking him back into her mouth again, relaxing her throat the best she can.

Shawn groans out, jaw slack as he holds her hair back. “That’s it, suck that cock just like that, baby,” he encourages, his filthy words only spurring her on and Shawn can’t believe how fucking dirty she is. This innocent little angel sucking dick like a slut.

Lola takes him deeper, relaxes her throat as she lowers her head. Her hands rest on his thighs, nose brushing against the short hairs on his pubic bone and her throat convulses around the head of his throbbing cock as she chokes. Shawn holds her hair back, completely fucked and his head falls back into the pillow, eyes rolling to another dimension.

“Uh, I’m gonna cum, baby,” he struggles out, expects her to pull off but she sucks him a little harder, bobs her head faster and she’s back to pumping what she can’t fit. Her panties are ruined, arousal seeping through her shorts and the sounds of his sinful moans are blessings to her ears.

“Oh, shit. Lola, fuck,” Shawn cries out, hips snapping to her pace and he’s spilling into her mouth as she sucks him dry, takes everything he has to offer. His thighs are quaking, vision blinding and he can’t tell his right from left. It’s all-consuming, absolutely soul-shattering and he can’t remember the last time he’s ever come so hard.

She pulls off him with a  _pop_ , lips sealed shut and Shawn leans up on his elbows to look up at her through hazy eyes. She’s grinning sheepishly, parting her lips and she eases her tongue out of her mouth, thick ribbons of his arousal coating it and she swallows it before his very eyes. Shawn’s sure he’s about to combust.

“Holy shit, c’ mere,” he beckons her over, grabs her arm and pulls her closer and he’s kissing her with everything he’s got. Can’t find anything hotter than the taste of himself on her tongue. “You’re so fucking sexy,” he mutters against her lips, hands on her ass and he’s gripping and smacking everything he can, loving the way she keens into his touch and cries out for more.

Shawn flips them over, spreads her legs and lays between them, lips still on hers. “Shawn,” she whispers breathlessly as he suckles on her neck, nips at her skin and they both know there’ll be a bruise in the morning. He hums but doesn’t stop his relentless attack as she bucks her hips up and against his.

“What do you want, honey? Tell me what you want,” he grins, teases her and she guides his hands to the hem of her shirt, indicating she wants it off. He takes a deep breath and does as she asks, lifts it over her chest and head and throws it to the floor and Shawn’s in fucking awe.

Her breasts are full, perky little handfuls on her chest and her pink nipples pearl under his gaze. “God, baby,” he groans, hands cupping the swell of her tits and he lowers his head, suckles softly on her left nipple while his fingers tweak the other. Lola keens into him, chest heaving and back arching and she’s tugging on those gorgeous fucking curls of his.

“Please,” she begs, lips quivering and his weight between her legs isn’t doing enough for her. Shawn grins to himself, smug that he’s already got her in such a withering state and he props himself up with his arms either side of her head, his lips brushing against hers.

“Tell me what you want,” he instructs, needs to know just how filthy the angel really is. She blushes and stares down at his lips but Shawn can’t look away from her eyes. “I want you,” she relents, breath shaky and Shawn’s grin grows but he shakes his head. It’s not enough.

“Where do you want me, baby? What do you want me to do?” he presses further and Lola’s come to the conclusion that she’s not gonna get what she wants unless she asks. She swallows back her nerves and her eyes flicker up to his, doesn’t miss the fire in them.

“Want you to touch my pussy,” she admits, voice shaky but she’s dead certain in her words and Shawn’s hard again. He gnaws down on his bottom lip, blood rushing south and he’s dying to know how sweet that little pussy of hers really is.

“Yeah?” he asks, hand gently resting on her throat and he’s pleasantly surprised when she grips his hand and forces his fingers to tighten around her.  _So she’s a kinky little angel,_  Shawn thinks. “My fingers?” he asks, squeezing her throat with them before leaning closer so his lips touch hers, “Or my tongue?” he adds, swiping a hot lick into her mouth and she shudders.

“Both,” she tells him.

Shawn grins with raised brows. “That’s a little greedy, don’t you think?” he toys, wonders if she’ll take their little act any further but he’s given her the option to back out if not. Lola knows what he’s up to, that he’s subtly trying to figure out what she’s into and if it’s the same as him.

Lola smiles to herself, can already feel the dominance oozing off him and she’s sure she radiates Whimpering Sub Energy. “But, I’ve been a good girl,” she treads lightly, spark in her eyes and Shawn’s completely fucking head over heels. His eyes are wide and he’s got a grin on his face.

They’re giggling just a little, like something comical is dancing in their eyes but it’s the shock and excitement of the situation. Shawn’s quick to snap out of it when he shimmies down her body and between her legs, gripping her thighs and she’s shuddering.

He wants to tease her, to get her begging for more but her pussy is so fucking close and he can see she’s soaked right through her little shorts. He’s tugging them off her legs soon after, gently spreading her legs by her knees and she plants her feet flat on the bed.

She’s fucking soaked, glistening with her juices and Shawn almost nuts on the spot. “Christ, baby,” he breathes, laying on his stomach between her legs.  _She’s fucking stunning_ , he thinks. Her folds are swollen, spread by the way her legs are tugged outward and he swears he sees her clit literally throb.

“Shit, Lo,” he admires her, hands on her thighs as he tries to pry her legs further open, licking his lips, mouth watering. Her head is pressed against the pillow, eyes shut tight as his warm breath fans over her and she’s trying not to cry from excitement.

“Look at you,” he coos, thumb ghosting over her bare pussy and he dips it between her folds, loves the way it sinks into a pool of wetness and it’s like he’s broke the barricade and it comes gushing out. Lola sucks in a breath and tries to lay as still as possible, but it’s proving difficult when Shawn kisses up her thighs.

“Prettiest little pussy I’ve ever seen, baby,” he groans, uses his pointer and middle finger to spread her lips and she’s even pinker. Shawn leans forward, massaging open-mouthed kisses on her sensitive skin and she squirms beneath him, hands flying to his curls and she tugs.

She’s sweet,  _so fucking sweet_  and Shawn could drown in her all night fucking long. He suckles on her lips, rubs his tongue over the smooth skin and Lola squirms beneath his touch. “Shawn, please,” she tells him, tugging harder on his hair and Shawn doesn’t bother trying to hide the smirk on his lips.

“So sweet baby, taste so fucking good,” he rasps, swiping his tongue between her folds and she shudders, keens into him and her hips roll into his face. Shawn laps her up, left hand on her thigh while the other keeps her lips spread.

“Fuck,” she shudders, head rolled back as Shawn hums against her. He’s lapping up everything she offers, won’t let a single drop go to waste as his lips close around her throbbing clit and he sucks, rolling his tongue around her sensitive nub.

She’s panting, sweating already and he’s only just started. Shawn’s moaning, humming, making any noise he can that will vibrate through her soul. She knows what he’s doing and she loves it, can’t get enough. Shawn swirls his middle finger around her entrance, literally feels it flutter in excitement and he tries to hide a grin when he sucks harder.

He eases his finger into her, gently pumping until he’s knuckle deep in her pussy and feeling every curve and divot in her walls. She’s gushing still, pussy squelching when he continues pumping, curls his finger to hit her just where she needs it and Lola lets out a sharp gasp, back arching and her nipples pearl even harder.

“Right there, baby?” he asks. “God, you’re so fucking tight,” he groans as he pulls off her clit, flicking his tongue over her and she’s nodding her head breathlessly, can’t believe how good he’s making her feel already. Shawn pulls his finger out, sucks it clean and he hums around it at her taste.

He sees her watching, the way her eyes blow wider and he’s smirking, rolling his finger between her folds again before raising his hand to her face. She smiles shyly, hand wrapping around his wrist and she opens her mouth, welcomes his finger. She sucks, hums and groans as her eyes flutter closed and Shawn’s cock twitches and jolts against the bedsheets at the sight.

“So fucking sexy, babygirl,” he tells her through a raspy groan, doesn’t miss her own moan that shortly follows before he’s using his other hand to fingerfuck her little pussy again while she sucks on the ones still in her mouth.

She’s a mess, thrashing relentlessly when he adds a second finger and curls just the way she likes. Shawn’s quick to tear his finger from her mouth as he descends back down her body and sucks on her pussy. His swollen lips are wrapped around her clit and something clicks within her, a feeling so indescribable it takes her off guard.

“Oh, shit,” she’s gasping, can’t stay still and her thighs begin to tremble as she grips his hair for dear life. There’s a fire burning in the pit of her stomach and she tries to push his head away but it doesn’t work, he’s relentless—slurping and sucking and fingering the way she deserves.

“Shawn, what’s… oh, God, I can’t… what’s…” she can’t get her words out, vision spotting and her whole body begins to shake and convulse as the air is knocked out of her. Then it happens. A blinding, all-consuming wave of pleasure that drowns her senses and she’s left with no control of anything.

She’s whining and moaning, borderline pornographic as Shawn groans against her clit, pulling off her and rubbing furiously with his fingers. He watches her, the way her thighs jiggle and breasts bounce. Her back is arched and her toes are curled and he feels her explode around his fingers, feels just how tight she gets and he’s grinning like a madman.

He pulls his finger out of her, sucks her juices off his skin and he’s lunging back into her sweet pussy again, lapping at everything she offers until she’s begging him to stop. He crawls up her body, brushing her matted hair from her face and her skin is glistening with sweat. Shawn’s heart swells and a small, loving smile graces his lips.

She’s spent, he can tell. She’s struggling to not pass out and Shawn rolls off her and lays by her side, head propped on his hand as he leans on his elbow. “Holy shit,” she breathes out a breathless chuckle and Shawn grins wholeheartedly.

“You okay?” he teases, but they both know his voice holds genuine concern. She nods her head quickly and tries to regain her breathing, tries to steady it out. She’s so focused on trying to calm down that she doesn’t notice Shawn leave her side and scurry out of the bedroom.

It’s not until she feels a gentle hand on her knee that her eyes flutter open and she sees him by the foot of her bed, a sheepish smile on his lips and cheeks a rosy hue. He’s cleaning her intimates with a damp cloth, kissing her knee as he does so and she smiles so drunkenly, heart swelling and she’s never had this type of aftercare before. Hell, she’s never had aftercare _at all._

Once he’s done, he’s dressing her in one of his clean shirts, loving how she drowns in the fabric and he doesn’t miss the way she smells the cotton and smiles softly. Shawn’s got a pair of boxers on when he lays beside her, back on his side as he studies her sleepy face.

“You okay?” he asks again, the lightheartedness gone and he’s worried it might’ve been too much for her. He’s never felt like this before. Lola nods her head, eyes drooping as she turns and snuggles closer so their noses are almost touching. “I’m okay,” she tells him.

They stay like that for a few minutes, neither of them wanting to get up and leave or ruin the moment and Shawn’s never felt so comfortable in a post-orgasm haze. “You wanna stay?” he whispers breathlessly and before he can overthink it or take it back, she’s humming and cuddling into his side.

Shawn stills, swallows back the lump in his throat and he shifts until he’s on his back and she rests her head on his chest. He’s sure she can hear the frantic thumps of his heart as he cautiously wraps and arm around her and holds her closer and he can feel her smile against his bare skin.

He feels the way Lola’s lashes flutter against his skin, how her breathing evens out and soft snores slip past her lips. Shawn smiles, pulling her closer. He feels warm, safe… like this is where he’s meant to be. He doesn’t bother trying to hide the smile when she tangles their legs unknowingly and he reaches over and pulls the sheets on them.

Shawn kisses the top of her head, leans into her and closes his eyes. “I want you, too,” he whispers as he feels himself begin to drift off to a peaceful slumber and Lola’s heart flutters in her half-asleep state.


	10. Part 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a night in the sheets, Shawn is ready to take things one step further and let her know the real him.

It’s a known fact that you subconsciously reach for your significant other during your sleep. It’s like you can’t ease into a slumber unless you feel their body close to yours, unless they share their warmth. And that’s exactly what wakes Shawn at 2:32 a.m., coldness.

He blindly reaches for her, the room swallowed by darkness until he notices the light that struggles to pour through the small crack beneath the bathroom door.

Shawn sits up and wipes the sleep from his eyes. His body is warm but her side is cold. _Her side_. Shawn groans, clears his throat and stretches a little, muscles taut and a little sore and he smiles. He sits up, back against the headboard as he waits for her with a little skip in his heart.

The bathroom door creaks open and Lola shuts off the light. Her hair is a glorious mess, eyes a little puffy from her sleep and she’s still wearing his shirt. She closes the door behind her and she stills in her tracks when she notices he’s awake.

Lola tucks her hair behind her ear and rocks on the balls of her feet, a shy blush on her cheeks. Shawn swoons. “I’m sorry, did I wake you?” she whispers, eyes dark and they can hardly see each other in the blackness of the room.

Shawn shakes his head. “No.”

He wants to tell her he woke up because she wasn’t there, because he reached over to hold her and she was gone, but he doesn’t. Lola nods and continues to sway on her feet, lips pursed and she suddenly feels awkward, like she shouldn’t be there.

He finds it amusing, how she was confident and freaky just hours ago, and now she’s back to being the shy little angel he fell for in the first place. Shawn dips his head and catches her gaze, wiggles his brows and pulls the sheets back. Lola blushes, licks her lips and she’s crawling into bed and back into his arms.

She curls into his side, his arm around her and he presses a chaste kiss to the top of her head. Lola purses her lips. “Did you mean what you said? That you want me?” she blurts out, doesn’t give her mind time to filter through her thoughts.

Shawn’s stunned for a hot minute, eyes wide and he shifts uncomfortably but he knows that wasn’t her intent. He clears his throat. “So you heard.” Lola purses her lips, steadies herself for the rough impact of rejection, but it doesn’t come.

“I mean, yeah, I meant it,” he admits, voice small and shaky and Lola almost chokes on her own tongue. “It’s just all very…  _new_ to me and I don’t, I don’t know what…” he trails off, can’t find the words he’s looking for but Lola gets it.

She shakes her head and sits up, turns to face him. “Okay, it’s okay,” she reassures him, soft smile on her lips and Shawn lets out a sigh of relief. He knows this feeling of clammy hands and an uneasy tummy. It’s nerves. And for once, he  _knows_ he cares.

He leans close to her, envelopes her sweet lips in his and they rest their forehead against the other’s. “I just wanna take things slow, you know?” he whispers breathlessly and Lola nods her head.

“We can go as slow as you want, Shawn,” she tells him, lips on his again and he smiles, heart full. As they pull away, Shawn tucks her hair behind her ears, thumb stroking over her cheekbones and they’re so close.

Lola stares at him with complete adoration, his left eye still slightly discoloured from the fading bruises but she wouldn’t notice it if she wasn’t so close. Her heart swells, remembering what he did.

“This is just so different for me, you know? I’m usually the bad guy that doesn’t take shit from anyone and doesn’t catch feelings,” he tells her, and Lola decides she could listen to him all day with the delicious rasp of his voice.

“Tell me about it,” she says and Shawn frowns slightly. “About how you used to be,” she clarifies and he stifles a laugh that tumbles through his chest and Lola thinks it’s the most beautiful sound.

“I was just plain trouble. Bar fights, street fights, drugs, sex, eveything,” he lists off, head resting on his pillow and Lola’s sitting on her legs as she smiles with a titled head, ready to know who he used to be.

“I hung out with this group of guys that just didn’t have any goals or ambitions in life. We spent our nights getting into fights, smoking weed and fucking chicks,” he tells her and he doesn’t miss the way Lola’s smile slightly falters and how her shoulders sag.

He reaches over and places a hand on her thigh, comfortingly. “I thought I was cool,” he tries to explain. “I knew I was a disappointment to my family, I was flunking classes, and doing that shit just let me escape if for a while, you know?” Shawn mumbles, eyes trained on the ceiling and Lola watches him closely.

He’s deep in thought, like he’s reliving the last three and a half years in his mind. He’s got a knott set in his brow and a grimace on his lips. She knows he hates what he was.

“What changed?” she asks him softly.

Shawn turns to her with dazzled eyes and a shy smile on his lips. He wonders if it’s too soon to tell her what changed, whether or not she’d run for the hills and call it bullshit, he doesn’t know.

He shrugs. “I went to college, got kicked out of NYU, came here,” he lists, thumb stroking the smooth skin of her thighs and  _fuck it,_  he decides. “Then I met you, and your kindness and compassion just….” he trails off, doesn’t quite know how to describe it and she’s blushing like crazy.

He clears his throat with a smile. “Since my dad showed up, things have been better. I’ve focused more on school work and my music, I talk to my mum and my sister everyday and I don’t feel like such a disappointment anymore, I know I’m trying my hardest.”

Lola smiles, hand on his and she brings it to her lips, peppering kisses and then holds it to her heart. “I’m proud of you, of how much you’ve changed,” she tells him and for once, Shawn believes it. He’s proud of himself, too.

He smiles and she releases his hand, let’s it drop back on her thigh and Shawn shifts to look at her better. “What about you? I wanna know about you now,” he tells her and Lola laughs nervously, playing with his fingers.

“Okay,” she breathes. “Where do I start? Um, my mom and dad broke up when I was four. He slept with his assistant and ran off with her,” she starts, jumping straight into the deep end and Shawn’s eyes widen.

“So, for the most part of my life, it was me and my mom. She was my best friend growing up but we didn’t see a whole lot of each other. When I was little, she was juggling three jobs to keep a roof over our heads, so I didn’t have a choice but to be independent,” she explains.

Shawn nods, listens intently to every word she utters. “When I was 14, I got my first job at an old bookstore I loved and I worked there after school and on weekends. On Saturdays, I used to meet mom at the diner she worked at before close and we’d go to the drive in theatre to watch crappy old movies,” she giggles at the hazy memory and Shawn smiles.

“I didn’t have many friends at school, I just focused a lot on my grades and I loved reading, so I’m sure you can imagine the abuse I got for that,” she stifles a laugh but it still hurts and Shawn frowns.

“When I was 16, my mom finished med school and got her residency to become a nurse, and that’s when Grayson, my dad, tried getting back in contact with me,” she sighs. “Long story short, we started talking again and he’d visit like once a month but that was it. Then two years later and I’m applying for colleges and I couldn’t afford anywhere without a scholarship. Grayson told me he’d pay my tuition on one condition, I moved to London with him.

"I refused, and he was bitter. But I, and I don’t know how, got a scholarship for here as an English major and here I am, working two jobs to send mom cheques so she can keep the house and desperately trying to maintain my 4.0 otherwise, it’s bye-bye Canada, hello London,” she groans.

Shawn’s in a haze, trying to process all of the information and rough childhood she’s had. He knew she was strong soul, but never in a thousand years had he expected to hear something like that.

“That’s insane,” he whispers, staring at her like she’s the epitome of strength and wonder, and he feels so honoured to have this opportunity to get to know her like he is.

She smiles and shrugs, toys with their fingers and he knows it’s a nervous habit of hers. “Wanna play 21 questions?” Shawn blurts out, tries to ease the shift in the atmosphere and Lola chokes out a laugh.

“What?” she giggles. “What are we? Twelve?”

Shawn rolls his eyes and pinches her thigh teasingly. “Come on, it’ll be fun for us to get to know each other a little better,” he tells her, pouting out his bottom lip and fluttering those gorgeously long lashes she’s always been jealous of.

“Fine,” she rolls her eyes, shifting until she’s comfortable and she flicks the nightstand lamp on, dim brightness breathing through the dark. “You go first,” she tells him. “Since it was your idea.”

Shawn hums and squints his eyes, scrunches his nose as he thinks. Lola laughs. “Come on, this was your idea!” she shrieks through her giggle and Shawn shushes her as he bites back a laugh. “Shh, I’m thinking,” he tells her.

Lola rolls her eyes and waits, takes the time to enjoy the sight of his messy hair and swollen lips and she quickly leans in to peck them before pulling away, like nothing happened.

“Okay, favourite colour?” Shawn asks. Lola tilts her head and hums. “Yellow. What’s your go to movie when you’re sad?” she counters and Shawn doesn’t miss a beat before replying, “Harry Potter,” and Lola grins.

He squeezes her thigh again. “Favourite food?” Lola hums and rakes her brain for a moment, can’t decide if it’s pasta or pizza so she says both, instead.

It goes on like that for another twelve questions, back and forth innocence and lighthearted giggles and they both feel so carefree. It’s nice.

“Okay, okay. Now the nitty gritty stuff,” Lola teases, lays on her stomach and props herself up by her elbows. “What’s your number?” she asks and Shawn frowns, keeps his eyes on her as he reaches the nightstand for her phone.

“You don’t have my number?” he asks, unlocking the phone and not at all surprised that she doesn’t have a passcode. Lola laughs loudly as he saves his phone number for her.

“No! I meant your number as in, body count,” she laughs out, watching his smile grow and he throws his head back into the pillow before handing her back her phone.

“Oh, man I just gave you my number and my Snapchat!” he giggles breathlessly, running a hand through his curls as he regains his stability. “Okay, my body count, uhhh,” he thinks for a moment, tries to remember the amount of girls he’s been with and his cheeks blush when he realises he doesn’t actually know.

“Oh my God, you don’t know, do you?” Lola gasps playfully, smacking his chest and Shawn catches her hand and lunges toward her, enveloping her lips in a sloppy kiss and she squeals against him, mind and body much more awake.

She pulls off him with a laugh and blushing cheeks. “I may not remember my number but I sure as hell remember last night, and you have no right to be getting blushy over a kiss,” he tells her, raspy and quiet and she feels in between her thighs.

Shawn smirks. “What about you? What’s your number?” he asks and Lola’s about to tell him he can’t ask the same question, but she doesn’t.

Instead, she blushes deeper. “Four,” she tells him quietly, doesn’t miss the way Shawns brows shoot to his hairline and that his eyes almost pop out of their sockets.

“And what’s even funnier is that last night was my first ever orgasm and we didn’t even have sex,” she blushes, isn’t too sure why she felt the need to tell him that but he’s smug and wiggles his brows as he kisses her again.

“What happened between you and Corina?” she asks her question, cringing at her timing but she wants to know and she doesn’t want to wait until something might rekindle for them.

Shawn pulls away with angrily pink cheeks and he’s trying not to laugh. Lola frowns as she watches him but there’s still a smile on her lips, curious to know why he’s suddenly acting so shy.

He runs a hand over his face and groans out a laugh before he’s staring at her with blushed cheeks. “I kinda, maybe, might’ve moaned your name when we were having sex,” he admits, eyes shut tight and Lola’s gaping at him with wide eyes.

She breaks out into a fit of giggles, loves the sound of his when he laughs with her and their cheeks are red and lips swollen when he pulls her in for another kiss that they laugh through.

“I can’t believe you did that,” she giggles, curls into his side and peppers his neck with soft kisses. Shawn’s blinded for a moment, completely consumed by her and his heart is swelling to twice its size.

He turns and holds her close, their legs intertwined and he brushes the stray strands of hair from her face. “How are you single?” he whispers to himself, finds it impossible to believe that someone like her hasn’t already been swept up.

Lola purses her lips and her quickly falters. “Guess I’ve just never been enough for anyone,” she croaks out, deosn’t want to ruin the perfcet night with her stupid insecurities and Shawn frowns, kisses her forehead.

“Last question,” she hums, one thing playing on her mind. “Why does everyone say you do don’t do nicknames?” she asks as she sits back up, legs crossed beneath his shirt and he shifts again, fingers tracing patterns over her knee.

He shrugs. “I don’t know, just never been something I’ve done,” he reasons, but they both know it’s a lie and Shawn knows Lola knows the truth. That he doesn’t use nicknames because nicknames mean feelings and feelings mean attachment.

Lola purses her lips. “But you call me nicknames,” she mentions.

Shawn smiles softly at her, the young, beautiful woman that’s breaking his walls. “I guess I do,” he says, like it’s the most nonchalant thing and his heart isn’t rapidly pounding in his chest.

They’re staring at each other like they’re the only people in the world, like nothing else matters. Lola blushes as he leans closer, captures her plump lips with his and it’s the softest, most gentle kiss either of them have ever felt.

She clears her throat as they pull away, nervously scratching that spot just behind her ear and Shawn licks his lips, can’t get enough of her taste. “I should probably go to my room… you know, God knows what the others would say if they saw me leaving later,” she tells him, and as much as Shawn wants her to stay, he nods his head.

He helps her to gather her clothes that’ve been sprawled across the floor and she holds them, bunched up close to her chest, not bothering to change and give him his shirt back. He smiles. Shawn walks her to his door, hands cupping her cheeks and he’s kissing her again.

“Wanna take you out on a date,” he whispers against her lips. Lola pulls back with wide eyes and raised brows, comedic yet shy smile on her lips. “Yeah? You’re sure?” she asks but he’s kissing her again and she giggles against him.

“Mhm, wanna take you out. Nothing fancy, but a little date. Just me and you.”

Lola purses her lips and nods her head, leaning on her tiptoes to press another kiss to his pink lips and he tucks her hair behind her ear again. “Tomorrow… or  _tonight_ , even?” he asks, head tilted as he corrects himself when he realises it’s almost 4 a.m..

Lola laughs. “Seven okay?” he asks her, heart swelling at the excitement on her face when she nods her head quickly and breaks out in a grin before he’s kissing her lips one final time.

“Goodnight, baby,” he whispers as he opens the door for her.

She smiles sheepishly, rocking on the balls of her feet before she slowly steps out of his room and across the hall to hers. He watches her open her door and step inside before she’s turning back to him with soft eyes and blushing cheeks.

“Goodnight, Shawn.”


	11. Part 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Lola can’t make it to the date, Shawn brings the date to her and keeps her company in the run-down diner.

He’s never been on a date before and he’s nervous. It’s only 3 p.m. and Shawn can’t stop thinking about the date, that isn’t for another four hours. He’s submitted another piece of music to Mayer, knows he won’t get a reply anytime soon but he’s got a headstart on schoolwork and now he doesn’t know what to do to occupy his mind.

He’s tried reading one of Lola’s books she’s left lying around the house, kicked a ball in the yard, made food. He’s tried everything but he can’t stop his jittering nerves or thinking all the ways he could fuck things up.

Shawn saw her this morning, stole longing glances as the others struggled to see through cloudy eyes and pounding hangovers. He remembers her shy smile and bright eyes, could feel the butterflies erupting in his stomach with every glance.

He stole a kiss from her lips when she left for work, pinched her ass when she turned her back and he didn’t miss the blush that sat on her cheeks. He smiles to himself, picks at his fingernails when Brian wanders into the kitchen, smothered in sweat and Shawn didn’t hear him get home from the gym.

“Hey bro, there’s this party tonight that Jayden’s throwing. Corina’s gonna be there, you comin’?” Brian asks, chugs down his water and Shawn grimaces as he tilts his head.

“Fuck no. I’m staying away from that psycho. You should, too,” Shawn tells him, shaking off the memory of the feeling of her hands on his body and he breaks out in shivers.

Mackey snorts out a laugh and nods. “I know, but Alessia wanted to go, and I can’t really say no to her,” Brian admits, light blush to his cheeks and Shawn raises his brow with a teasing grin.

“Alessia, eh? Who’s that?” he teases, chin in his hand as he leans on the counter. Brian rolls his eyes, doesn’t wanna get into it but he knows that Shawn is genuinely interested and he quickly caves with a sigh.

“Dude, she’s amazing,” he sighs, slumping against the stove and Shawn beams at his friend, can’t seem to control his happiness. “She’s just… I don’t know man. We’ve only been on a few dates but fuck, I’d do anything to see her smile,” he admits.

Shawn takes in his words, hears everything he says but all he can think about is Lola and he’s blushing again. Brian notices, wonders if he should mention it but soon decides not to, figures Shawn will tell him when he’s ready.

“That’s great, Bri. Happy for you,” he tells him with a tight-lipped smile, like he’s trying to stop himself from beaming. Brian nods, doesn’t say anything and it’s quiet for a few moments before Shawn pats a beat to counter and stands.

“I gotta go, inspiration calls,” he says as he waves his guitar around in his hand. Brian nods as Shawn wanders off, bounds up the stairs and into his room.

He throws the guitar on the bed, reaches for his phone and he’s quickly pressing on the last contact in his call log as he raises the phone to his ear.

“Hello?” the gruff voice sounds on the other end.

“Dad, I’m taking Lola on a date and I need some tips.”

——

Her feet are sore and she’s almost falling asleep at the cash register, but she’s got one thing on her mind that’s keeping her awake. Her date with Shawn in less than two hours.

She’s got one more hour until she clocks out and she’s counting down the seconds, tapping her foot against the tiled floor as she does so. She’s waiting for Emily to give her a break when her phone vibrates in the pouch of her apron.

Lola scans the diner quickly, can’t see anyone that’d tell on her, and she pulls her phone out, hiding it beneath the cash register as she reads the text.

 **Shawn:**  Still up for tonight? X

She smiles to herself, shy blush on her cheeks and just as she’s about to reply, Emily is pacing toward her with a pale expression as she holds the small swell of her stomach. Lola’s smile drops, she knows what’s about to happen.

“I’m so sorry to ask, but-” Lola waves her off with a tight-lipped smile and Emily sighs thankfully, pressing a kiss to her friend’s cheek before grabbing her purse and taking off.

She knows she should’ve told Emily no, that she’s got plans, but the poor girl is pregnant at twenty-one with incredibly gruesome morning sickness. Lola wasn’t about to make her friend stay when she could easily work her hours and reschedule her plans.

She pulls her phone back out again with a sigh and types a text to Shawn.

 **Lola:** I was… and then something came up and I’m stuck here til midnight to close up. I’m so so sorry x

Lola nibbles on her bottom lip when she hits send, a pang of guilt in her chest and she knows he’ll understand, but she was so excited for the date. She pockets her phone again and wiggles her toes in her tennis shoes, preparing for the next seven hours of hell.

——

She’s scrubbing the milkshake machine, taking deep breaths as the sweltering heat begins to corrupt her. She’s sweating, feels gross in her tight uniform and inwardly rolls her eyes when another customer rings the little bell at the counter.

Lola sighs and drops her cloth, wipes her hands across her white apron tied around her waist and plasters on her best smile. “What can I get you?” she asks generically, digging though her front pouch for her notebook and pen.

“Two vanilla milkshakes, please.”

Her head snaps up at the sound of the soft voice, those familiar curls staring back at her Lola’s smile involuntarily grows. “What are you doing here?” she asks softly, leaning into the counter as she places her notebook and pen on it.

Shawn grins and folds his arms over the surface, a grin on his lips and he shrugs his shoulders. “Thought I’d bring the date to you and keep you company,” he tells her, flashing his pearly whites and Lola’s blushing, tucking strands of hair behind her ear.

He’s got a denim jacket on, a vast change from the leather but Lola’s living for it. It’s got her heart fluttering in her chest and pussy throbbing between her thighs.

“I’m not gonna be much fun, just a warning,” she huffs, stretches her hand out and Shawn takes a look at the diner as customers begin to fly in.

She’s a little frozen in awe. Can’t believe he decided to come and sit with her while she works the night away. Part of her wants to reach over the counter and kiss him like her life depends on it, but then she realises it’s not exactly first-date-like.

“That’s okay, just being near you is enough,” he admits sheepishly, hooded eyes watching her. Lola blushes again, cheeks burning and it isn’t from the heat. She scuffs her shoes and turns on her heels, grabs two large milkshake glasses and starts up the machine.

She can feel his eyes on her ass as she leans on one hip and watches the glasses fill up. “Cream?” She asks, peering back at him over her shoulder. He’s got a grin on his face, chin resting in the palm of his hand with a smile on his lips.

“Of course,” he mutters, eyes back on her ass when she turns around and pulls the glasses from beneath the machine. Lola places them on the inner counter, reaches for the fridge where she retrieves a bottle of whipped cream and squirts two large swirls on the milkshakes.

“Are you gonna put the cliché cherries on the top, too?” Shawn teases with a grin and Lola glares up at him playfully. She adds the cherries and sets both the milkshakes on the counter, leaning on her forearms with a grin.

“That’s $3.68, sir,” she quips, watches him dig through his wallet and fish out the change. He hands it over, watches her sway over to the cash register and he pops a cherry in his mouth, shooting her a wink.

“If I’d have known you were such a cheap date, I would’ve taken you out sooner,” he teases playfully, chewing on the fruit and Lola fakes a gasp and presses a hand to her chest.

She places her hands on her hips and raises her brows. “You don’t get cherries on your milkshakes anymore,” she tells him, picks the fruit off the other milkshake and pops it into her mouth.

Shawn grins with widened eyes, the stem peeking out between his lips. He’s about to make a flirty comment when she’s called over by another customer and taking their order.

He watches her talk to the older woman, heart swelling at the wholesome smile she offers and blush that rises to her cheeks when the lady refers to her as a “beautiful young woman,” and it’s true, she is.

——

It’s been four hours and Shawn hasn’t moved from his seat at the counter. He’s ordered two baskets of fries and hot wings for them both, and another two milkshakes, that Lola went against her word on, and added the cherries.

The diner has quietened down a bit, but it’s still only Lola waitressing and Jerry behind the grill. It’s 7 p.m. and Shawn’s currently the only customer, aside from Old Man Marley that’s just finishing his burger in his regular booth.

Shawn’s abandoned his denim jacket, folded it over the seat beside him and he’s bulging out of the short sleeves of his t-shirt, something Lola’s made very obvious she’s enjoying.

It’s hot in the diner, and the heat from the grill behind Lola isn’t helping the increasing amount of sweat she’s producing. She’s got a smile on her face, though—smile on her lips that isn’t from the heat and Shawn’s just the same.

Considering this wasn’t what Shawn had planned, he’s not exactly disappointed with how their night has gone so far. Lola’s been sneaking fries between customers and cleaning tables, Shawn actually feeding her them at one point.

She’s got another three hours left and she’s starting to feel guilty. She doesn’t want to ruin Shawn’s entire evening and she’s sure he’s already bored of sitting around. “You don’t have to stay ‘til I finish, you know,” she mumbles, afraid he’s going to agree and get up and leave, even if she knows she can’t blame him if he does.

He doesn’t. Instead, he shrugs and shakes his head as he takes a sip of his milkshake. “Of course I do, babe. Gotta walk you home and kiss you at the door,” he winks, playful glint in his iris’ and Lola rolls her eyes with a shy laugh.

_…. And kiss you at the door._

She nibbles on her lower lip, missing the feeling of his plump lips on hers… missing the taste of him. She feels bold for a moment and leans forward on the counter. “Who says you have to wait until we’re at my door?” she whispers.

Shawn raises a brow, casually looks over his shoulder and around the diner. Old Man Marley is finishing his drink and Jerry’s bopping his head to some generic song that’s sounding from the overhead speakers.

He looks back to Lola, the corners of his lips curling into a smirk and he leans a little closer. “Yeah?” he asks, strawberry milkshake breath fanning over her lips and she grins, nodding her head and trying not to let her knees buckle.

“Yeah,” she whispers back, giggling quietly as he leans closer and envelopes her soft lips with his. It’s soft, gentle. Everything a not-first-kiss should be and she keens for more. Shawn swipes his tongue across her bottom lip, grinning against her and she pulls away, cheeks flushed.

Shawn’s grinning, wiggling his brows and with his eyes locked on hers, he grabs a french fry and lifts it to her lips, feeding her. “Pretty sure this is an opening to a porno,” Jerry comments from behind them, flipping a burger.

Lola’s eyes widen and her face reddens in embarrassment. She near chokes on the food and Shawn bows his head, knocking it against the counter and chuckles to himself. “Thanks, Jerry,” Lola mumbles out through pursed lips, spinning on her heels and shooting Jerry a not-so-lovely look.

He holds his hands up, spatula in the air and Lola watches him take the burger off the grill and place it on a bun. “I’m just stating the obvious here,” he shrugs.

Lola takes a breath and turns back to Shawn, who is now grinning widely at her. “First date and we made a porn intro,” he jokes, playing with Lola’s fingers and she bursts into laughter, the kind of laughter that has her head thrown back and cheeks aching, and Shawn decides he can listen to it all night long.

——

It’s nearly 11 p.m by the time Lola and Jerry finish closing up and cleaning. Shawn had grabbed a mop and cleaned the floor while Jerry cleaned the grills and Lola locked the doors, turned off the lights, and wiped down the tables.

It’s freezing out, and Lola hates that she didn’t bring a fucking jacket but she thinks she spots Shawn’s jeep in the parking lot, so she’s not so bothered. “You in tomorrow, Lola?” Jerry asks as he locks the front door and stuffs the keys into his pocket.

Lola shakes her head as Shawn wraps his arm around her shoulders, loving how she instinctively cuddles into his side. “No, I got three days off, I’m just at the flower shop,” she tells him through a yawn, legs cold.

Jerry nods and parts ways with them as he wanders over to his motorbike across the parking lot. Shawn watches him as he and Lola slowly walk away. “He seems nice, I like his bike,” he comments and Lola hums, cuddles closer into his side. “Yeah, he’s like an uncle to me,” she yawns again, arms around his waist as they walk.

Shawn stops her as they get to the gate, shrugs off his jacket and ignores her strange look when he drapes it over her shoulders. “I walked here, didn’t think to bring the jeep,” he tells her, sorrowful smile on his lips and Lola nods, coddling into the warmth and scent of his jacket.

“But you’re going to get cold,” she mumbles, tries to shrug the jacket off, but Shawn places his hands on her shoulders and dips his head to kiss her nose. “Then you better stay really close to keep me warm,” he smiles.

They walk together in comfortable silence, fingers intertwined and she’s cuddling his arm, head somewhat resting against his bicep the best she can as they walk. “Sorry for bailing on the date, Emily’s sick and pregnant and I wasn’t about to let her stay on her feet for seven hours, serving people,” she explains, eyes on the road ahead.

Shawn hums and kisses Lola’s head, smile on his lips and he just keeps falling in love with her kindness. “It’s okay, we had fun still, right?” he asks, suddenly nervous that maybe she didn’t enjoy splitting milkshakes and goofy jokes as much as he did.

“Of course, and I can’t believe you kept me company for the entire seven hours,” she laughs out softly, Shawn’s cheeks blushing and he smiles to himself. “Well, you’re good company,” he teases back, kissing the top of her head and Lola pulls away from him with a smile.

Their fingers are still intertwined as they walk, laughing and talking about anything and everything and before they know it, they’re wandering up the steps to the house, fingers still intertwined. Shawn’s about to unlock the door when Lola quickly stops him with wide eyes.

“Wait, everyone will still be up! We can’t just walk in together holding hands,” she tells him, trying to release his, but he grips her a little tighter. “Why not? It’s none of their business what we do,” he shrugs, brows furrowed.

Part of him wonders if she’s embarrassed by him, that she doesn’t want her friends knowing there’s something between them, but then she leans up and kisses him like he’s everything to her, and those thoughts slowly fade away.

“I know, and you’re right. But I just… this is new for you, and anything past a successful first date is kinda new for me too, and I just wanna—” Shawn doesn’t let her struggle much longer for her words before he’s nodding his head and pulling her into a hug, can practically feel the anxiety rolling off her in waves.

“Okay, it’s okay, I get it,” he whispers. He holds her for a few more seconds before pulling away and gnawing on the inside of his cheek, trying to muster up a plan and Lola seems to do the same.

“Okay, you know what, we can just walk in together. If anyone asks, I was in the area and saw you walking home from work, so we walked back together,” he shrugs, ready to open the door but Lola tugs his arm and pulls him back.

“And why were you in the area?” she asks him, expectant for an answer and she knows Maisee would definitely ask if she had her suspicions. Shawn raises his brows and flails his arms around. “Why would they need to know that?” he whispers out a yell. Lola rolls her eyes and matches his tone. “Because they’re nosy and have nothing better to do.”

Shawn sighs and runs a hand through his hair when a thought comes to mind and he looks to Lola, worry in his eyes and she squints. “I mean…. Corina’s apartment is a few streets away from the diner,” her cringes, scratching the back of his head.

He half expects her mood to falter, but it doesn’t. She nods and grins, leans up to kiss his lips and shrugs his jacket off her, handing it back to him. “Perfect,” she giggles, wandering past him and opening the door. Shawn follows, silly grin on his lips and she was right, they’re all awake and watching them both walk through the door.

“And where have you two been?” Maisee asks, hands on her hips and a knowing smirk on Raegen’s lips.

“Work.”

“Corina’s.”

They answer at the same time, neither of them missing the look on Maisee’s face at the mention of the  _Capri Sun_  and Lola fakes a sad look, tries not to laugh in their faces and everyone’s suddenly no longer interested in what Shawn and Lola have to say.

Maisee squints at them both for a second. _Didn’t Brian say Corina was at a party?_

Shawn makes his way to the kitchen, fishes out a beer and pops the cap while Lola stands in the archway in her diner uniform and rocking on the balls of her feet. Shawn doesn’t say anything else before he brushes past Lola and up the stairs, ignoring the death glare that Maisee shoots at him.

Lola purses her lips and offers a genuine smile, though to Maisee, it doesn’t seem so real. “I’m heading to bed, mine and Emily’s hours at that damn diner sucked,” she jokes halfheartedly, about to take the stairs when Maisee collars her.

“You okay?” she asks softly, eyes full of despair for her best friend and Lola feels guilty for lying to her and not screaming that they were just on a date. “Yeah, fine. Just wanna get to bed,” she purses her lips and Maisee nods solemnly, kissing Lola’s cheek and leaving her as she wandered back into the kitchen.

Lola lets out a deep breath and jumps the stairs two at a time, giddy smile on her lips and it only grows when she sees Shawn waiting outside her bedroom door for her, grin on his lips and she eases into his hold.

“Think they believed it?” he asks, brushing her hair from her face and Lola grins, nodding her head. “It’s kinda exciting, sneaking around,” she admits sheepishly, leaning up and kissing his lips quickly.

Shawn wants more, though—hands sneaking down her body and he grabs handfuls of her ass, groping and squeezing and Lola’s letting out breathless whimpers into his mouth. It isn’t until she remembers they’re still standing in the hall that she pulls away, head hazy and Shawn’s grinning still with flushed cheeks.

“Let me take you out again. On a proper date. Dinner, bowling, the zoo….. I don’t care, whatever you want. Tomorrow?” he asks, excitement evident in the twinkle in his eyes and Lola nibbles on her bottom lip, hands on his chest and she shrugs.

“Let me think about it,” she teases, Shawn’s eyes widening and his jaw drops at her words. Lola giggles, kissing his lips again and he growls into the kiss, nipping on her bottom lip and she pulls away sharply.

“ _Think about it?_  Lola Jane, you are such a tease,” he mutters out playfully, smile on his lips and he tries to kiss her again but she’s laughing too much to close her mouth long enough. “Stop laughing, Lo. I can’t kiss you otherwise,” Shawn groans, kissing every inch of her face instead, but it still doesn’t stop her from breaking into giggles.

He pulls away soon after, a smile of his own on his face and he kisses her cheek one last time before taking a step back. “Think about it,” he says, backing into his bedroom and she nods her head, backing into hers and they close their doors at the same time.

Lola lets out another laugh, falling onto her bed with a lovesick grin when she feels her phone vibrate in her skirt pocket. She pulls it out, grin on her lips as she reads the text from Shawn.

 **Shawn:** Have you thought about it yet?

She giggles, unlocking it and reading the text again before typing back a reply.

 **Lola:**  After much consideration and a thorough sweep of my diary, I conclude I am very much free and accept your invitation of a date tomorrow.

 **Shawn:** Splendid. I look forward to it, m’lady Xx

 **Lola:**  Goodnight Shawn x

 **Shawn:** Goodnight, baby x

Lola smiles as she locks her phone, hands on her chest and she’s grinning like crazy, heart so full she’s sure it’s going to burst, and Shawn’s across the hall, doing the exact same.


End file.
